Was a potential boyfriend, now he's gone forever?

I met a guy whom I really liked. It was attraction at first sight as both of us were attracted to each other the moment we laid eyes on each other. We had a lot of eye contact and he would. ALWAYS stare at me as if he couldn't take his eyes off me and he literally made me feel incredibly special.

Never in my life had someone looked at me in the way he used to look at me. His face always had a pure look as if he had seen something extraordinary even though I am not even that attractive.

The only problem was that he was someone who was very into studies and was extremely focussed on human rights and welfare and was also the student representative hence he was also busy with people or into human rights discussions and meetings.
He seemed quite inexperienced as he resorted to really silly moves to get my attention on him like being loud or hovering around me quite a lot or simply staring at me to the point where it seemed as if he was eye fucking me.

I finally spoke to him and we talked a little bit and exchanged names and he grabbed me by my shoulder. His pick up line was have we met before?

But after that he started giving me mixed signals. I mean he ignored me in front of his friends but I can understand that because I would also feel uncomfortable in front of his friends or even my friends.

I did see him glance over me but we couldn't talk and after that I could not meet him alone because he left for his home country and I left for mine for summer vacations. Though I ve heard he may not come back as he's finished with school.

I miss him incredibly. I took the first move after he made a lot of desperate attempts to get my attention for starting a conversation but I did not understand what went wrong that he started acting cold.
I don't think we will ever see each other again and that hurts.
Its really painful for me to let go because I finally felt I found someone who would truly appreciate me. What to do? How do I cope with this misery?


Most Helpful Guy

  • this will be a hard thing to do but i have to say that a woman needs attention and compassion i understand maybe u had a flare in the beginning but as u said he changed.. all. i wanna tell. u is if he was really the one he wouldn't change at all with you.. with my all respect to both of you.. but i can say that he doesn't deserve a woman like YOU.. you deserve to be treated nicely and feel secured and if he didn't give that.. you have to move on even if its hard for you..


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What Girls Said 2

  • This can be difficult since you never actually had a relationship with him, so your last image of him is this 'what if' and the potential of an amazing relationship. I'm going to burst your bubble. From what you have said, it seems that if you were to be in a relationship with him, there would be communication problems (him giving mixed signals). Also, I disagree with feeling uncomfortable in front of friends, when I like a guy, I am proud to be with him and proud to call him mine, actually I want to call him mine so other people (girls) know he's taken and off the market.

    You also barely know this guy, from what was written, it honestly doesn't sound like you two ever talked much. Are you sure you actually liked him or liked the IDEA of him. Do you think he would truly appreciate you or do you assume he would appreciate you because he's into human rights and welfare. I really think you created this ideal, this fantasy and were in love with that. How to cope with it, stay busy, realize that he probably does have his faults (communication, those mixed signals) that would have been incompatible in a real relationship, move on.

    • I can't claim him in front of my friends or his friends until we actually date. Just because we liked each other doesn't mean we can start showing off.

      I didn't like the idea of him. I liked him. And the way he acted with me was why I felt not because of human rights. Human rights has nothing to do with love.

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    • It was a bit odd for me tho coz our friends aren't mutuals and I feel shy approaching him in front of his friends. And I noticed he was also comfortable only when we were alone. Like just two of us.

      And yeah that's what I said. Until we talk and get to know each other, we can't just claim only because we stare at each other and like each other

    • Perhaps there are some cultural differences or something between us. But I've never thought it odd or weird to talk to a guy in front of his friends.

  • It sounds like you're in love with the idea of him since you don't actually know him. I know it's hard to do but keep looking, the right man will come your way :)


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