I'm no longer happy with my relationship I need advice?

So my girlfriend and me have been together for one year and 3 months now. As a 20yo male I have a pretty high sex drive. My girlfriend is 18.
Now we've only been at it like maybe 8 timed and I feel like it isn't enough for me. I won't lie the thought of cheating on her or breaking up has been in my mind. I dont know the reason why she doesn't want to have more sex. I treat her like a queen every time she's here. I cook for her watch romantic movies eventhou I hate them and she knows that. I just need advice on what I should do because I don't know anymore. Talking will not help because I tried and she brought up a stupid excuse.I'm no longer happy with my relationship I need advice?


0|0

Most Helpful Girl

  • "I won't lie the thought of cheating on her or breaking up has been in my mind."
    Whatever you do, don't cheat on her. If it's impossible for the two of you to reach some kind of understanding you should break up with her, but don't cheat. Have the decency to end things before moving on to other women.

    "I treat her like a queen every time she's here. I cook for her watch romantic movies eventhou I hate them and she knows that."
    You can't just fill her up with imaginary kindness coins and expect to "hit the jackpot". I'm willing to guess this is just a matter of different sex drives, but if that is or isn't the case, keep that in mind regardless.

    "Talking will not help because I tried and she brought up a stupid excuse."
    And there is your biggest problem. How did you approach her with this problem? If it's anything like you've posed your question, I can definitely understand if she shuts off and won't give you any real answers. Have you tried to sit down with her and have a real heart to heart? If this isn't just a matter of different sex drives, you're never ever going to find out what the actual problem is if you can't set aside your own feelings on the matter for a second. Approach her calmly, explain that you love her and you want to make things work, but as things are you're unhappy in the relationship. Maybe she's into things that you don't know about - if you can get her to share those things it could spice things up a lot for you. Or maybe she has a specific issue, with her body or her sexuality, or you. Whatever it is, if you want to find out and fix this, you need to approach her empathically. Be willing to hear her out, even if her reasons seem silly at first (emotions are often silly, but that doesn't mean they're not important).
    If you're not willing to communicate with her about this in a mature way, your relationship is already over. Sorry to be so blunt, but that's just how it is. Talk to her or break up with her.

    0|1
    0|0

Most Helpful Guy

  • Just wondered what the excuse was?

    Anyway you guys are young and your communication is prob not the best. Women's sex drive is a little more complicated and, it's not an insult, but maybe you are coming at this from an immature stand point. Don't be mad bro it takes some of us years to see our own faults. I say talk to her and listen. Try not to take it personally and don't get mad. There is prob some intimacy missing or something on her mind or something isn't clicking for her. If you don't get the bottom of it you will prob re live this situation in other relationships

    1|1
    0|0

What Girls Said 20

  • Break up with her. Sooner is better than latter or it will hurt you both a lot more the longer you guys stay in the relationship. Unless after be dating for years you will want less sex so you both can be happy. The odds is that if you are unhappy in your sexual life, you will cheat if you have the opportunity.
    I've been in your position, dated for years hoping that they guy would have more desire or whatever, stupid idea.

    0|1
    0|0
  • The sex might not be satisfying to her, or she's more reserved. She's quite young, so either is possible.

    Do you "treat her like a queen" sexually? Or is it something you do to get yourself off?

    0|1
    0|0
  • You sound like my ex-boyfriend... he wasn't getting enough sex from me. We were doing it maybe one every week or two. He wanted it on the daily. He then left me without ever giving me a real reason.

    My advice - if you seriously believe that this is a relationship killer for you then be honest with her. Have a serious sit down and talk with her. If she gives you some poor excuse again, then tell her that this is not going to work out as you have desires of your own that she cannot fulfill. Do not force her into anything or lie/cheat on her. Best of luck.

    2|0
    0|0
  • The fact you said when I ask "she brings up a stupid excuse" that shows me you are not supportive and not caring of her feelings. Maybe she needs more reassurance you want to be with her for her and doesn't feel used like all you want her for is sex. If you really care about her listen to her ask her what you can do for her to be more comfortable to have sex with you. If you do not care to ask her and feel you dnt need to go through all that than break up with her although you leaving her for sex isn't the best reason.

    0|0
    0|1
  • Break up. Live your life. You're young. If your sex drive is that high and it's already a problem after only a year to the point you think about cheating it's only going to get worse. I've been in your position. You will cheat and even if she doesn't find out you'll then wonder what else you're missing out on sexually with others. So you'll continue to cheat. You tried telling her how you feel she didn't listen or try to compromise at all? Then she never will. She'll play excuse after excuse. So best to end it and live free. Live safe but free. That way you won't have the guilt of cheating. You'll just be living your life.

    0|0
    0|0
  • 1.) Maybe she's afraid that if she has too much sex with you she's being used.
    2.) She could have a self-esteem issue. Being insecure about her body.
    3.) She could have been raped and scared to tell you.
    4.) She could be cheating.

    2|0
    0|0
  • If it's that important to you, find a girl with a higher sex drive.

    1|1
    0|0
  • If you are ever in a situation, where you think you are going to cheat on her, break up with her. Maybe sit her down and have an honest conversation about how you feel

    0|0
    0|0
  • Dude, don't cheat on her. Just break up with her. You shouldn't betray someone like that. If you care about you'll be honest with her and let her go. Relationships are about trust and respect, cheat on her and you're breaking both. I get that sex is important for a relationship so as I said, just break things off and go your separate ways.

    0|0
    0|0
  • What triggers a Sex Drive varies from woman to woman. Try figuring this out. Talk to your girlfriend about how you feel & what you expect clearly. From what you explained about how you take care of her, it appears you really like her. In which case, it may not be right at this time of your relationship to pull out merely because of this reason. Secondly, as your girlfriend is very young you can give her time. I know of a friend of mine, who has very high sex drive now, when earlier she was almost disinterested in sex (initially). Wishing you the very best :)

    0|0
    0|0
  • Before you break up with her or move on
    Just tell her how you feel
    She can't solve your problem without knowing what it is
    So just tell her you both should work together to fix it
    If you really care about her just give her a chance and talk to her and find out why and see if there is a way to solve the issue without drastic measures or a nasty break up

    The best thing to do is just talk to her and see if she is willing to have sex more often and what else you like to save your relationship

    0|0
    0|0
    • If not and she doesn't want to make you happy or isn't willing to work it out then I say yes you should break up with her after giving her a chance to solve the problem

      Tell her what the problem is ahead of time don't wait until you can't take it anymore and want to talk to her

  • if you ain't happy leave it you sound like a dick so be one

    2|0
    1|0
  • Ask what the issue is and how u can help. Cheating sucks man

    0|0
    0|0
  • I stopped wanting to have sex with my sex because of the birth control I was on, maybe its that?

    0|0
    0|0
  • Break up, just break up.

    0|0
    0|0
  • You just want sex, not a relationship. It's obvious at this point. Break up with her before you do anything stupid.

    0|0
    0|0
  • if sex is more important than her as a partner ( you thought about cheating), then i think its best you find someone else

    0|0
    0|0
  • Break up with her, go pig around with other women who want to fuck you.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It sounds like you're just not seeing eye to eye and it's making you unhappy. There's nothing left for you to do besides break up unfortunately. You've tried talking it out, which was the right thing to do, but it didn't go anywhere. As hard as it may be, breaking up is the best thing to do.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Time to walk away

    1|1
    0|0

What Guys Said 1

  • You do something for her that she loves yet you hate and she refuses to do something for you that you love. This only ends one way, either you breakup or you breakup.

    0|1
    1|0
Loading... ;