(Ex) boyfriend and I broke up because of his mental health, should I give him space?

Hi guys, I'm new to all of this, a little scared but thought I'd give it a go and get some help/advice, if I can please. I had been with this guy for 8 and the relationship meant the world to me, he also said the same. I could honestly see a great future ahead of us, we had spoke about being together for a long amount of time and how happy we were with each other, and it felt great, it really did. Things can't always stay in the 'honeymoon period' of a relationship, and recently he had said that himself, and I agreed because eventually things move forward, but he called me his partner instead of his girlfriend, which I really liked. Recently he's been having financial troubles, he could never really pay for things for us, and felt annoyed when he couldn't do so. He then opened up to me and told me a few things about his past, that were very deep, that he had never told anyone before. He even broke down to me which he'd never done before, to anyone. He told me he 'needed space' to sort himself out. A couple weeks had gone by and we met up and spoke, he admitted that he had a mental health problem and that he didn't want my help, he said he usually just powers through it himself. He told me he needed to take a step back from everything and sort things out 1 by 1 and with that, we ended it. He didn't fight for it either, which upset me more. He was like a different person and it's totally broke me. He changed his profile photo on Facebook from us to himself and his dog and we haven't spoken for about a week now. He mentioned how he just wanted to be alone from everyone and that he didn't know what he wanted and couldn't see his future for anything. I really miss him and want to be there for him, I've had to reach out to his family because I am so concerned for him.
I've felt very differently with him than I have with anyone else, I want to fight for the relationship but should I give him space?

Thank you


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Most Helpful Guy

  • he just needs space and time initially boys feels good after a break up bur after sometime they just become normal... everyone needs space give him he will approach you soon!

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    • Thank you samizayn for you opinion, I really appreciate it! Let's hope for the best :)

Most Helpful Girl

  • Mental health is really important. Sounds like he has a lot going on. You can't be happy in a relationship until you're happy with yourself. If he is asking for space right now give it to him. See what he does with this time. Is he truly working on himself? If so, I'm sure he will reach out when he is ready. I know it's hard changing your routine when you're used to seeing and talking to someone all the time. Take this as an opportunity for you to work on yourself. Do things that's make you happy and focus your mind on other things. Maybe you can check in with him in about a month asking how he is doing. Time will either strengthen your relationship or break it.

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    • Thank you Snowbabysher for taking the time to reply to my post. I am definitely going to take your advice on board, it's been really helpful! Thank you

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • i would suggest you to give him some space. but be there when he needs you. he will appreciate that as well

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    • Thank you rabee, giving him space is the best thing I can do right now. We haven't been in contact for about a week and I have promised myself that I will message him soon enough. None of us have reached out to each other yet, but I feel like it will have to be me who makes the first move. Thank you again I appreciate your honesty

    • if he has asked you to give space. i think you should wait for a while more. but somehoe let him know you are there for him when you need him.

  • He's full of shit. It's over permanently and completely and you will not remain friends even if he suggests or agrees to it nor will you ride off into the sunset together and live happily ever. What he's done is a ploy to keep you hanging around like you are so he can use you as a backup plan till he finds someone else or if he can't find someone else to fuck. Stop being pathetic and move on

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  • so what does the family say if you talk to them do they even know do they even understand

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    • He doesn't really have any friends to confine in, he's a bit of a loner, so his family were the only option I had to confine in. I've spoken to them about his wellbeing recently and about the break up itself and until he had opened up to me about it, they didn't even know he was feeling the way he was, he sat down and spoke to them about it, and they've suggested he go and see someone about the way he's been feeling

    • well I'm sure they did so it was like I said they didn't even know nothing about it either

What Girls Said 1

  • If he wants his space, give it to him right now. There is not much you can do if he doesn't want help either. It sounds like he is pushing everyone out of his life, which leads me to believe he is depressed. At this point, the only option my be for you and his family to have an "intervention" to encourage him to get help.

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    • I really appreciate your advice/help thank you! It is always difficult in a situation when trying to get advice from people you don't know in a site like this but I am so grateful you've taken the time to write back, thank you!

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