I cheated and I don't know if I should tell him or not?

my boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. we been together for a year and 1 /2 he told me he cheated on me I was so hurt that I cheated on him just so he would know how I felt. but after I did it I thought that I might just be losing the love of my life if I tell him the truth. he's the type of person that wouldn't be able to handle me cheating. and I no that so rather than throw our relationship away I've keep it a secret. am I being selfish?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You are not being selfish. You are actually doing the harder thing than telling him. Telling him would be about relieving your guilt and/or hurting him. By not telling him you are having to live with your guilt all alone and that is not easy.

    I think you have learned a valuable lesson here, that two wrongs don't make a right. What he did was not cool at all but cheating on him only made things worse, much worse. I would leave this in the past and move on.

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    • Thats what I think to as long as I never do it agin we should be good I'm okay with liven with the guilt as long as I'm with him he makes it worth it without even knowin

    • To me this is one of the signs of being mature and wise, a stage many adults will never experience. It is not always easy living with our mistakes especially when we have to look to ourselves for forgiveness instead of getting it from those around us (and make sure to give yourself forgiveness). Thanks for best answer.

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What Guys Said 3

  • The moment you lose your honesty is the moment you lose your relationship.

    Yes, you need to tell him, and the two of you need to have an in-person conversation about the validity of this relationship.

    It sounds to me like there is no reason for either of you take it seriously, but it is up to the two of you to have that crucial conversation on what the two of you are really doing.

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  • Every time you open your mouth to your boyfriend at ANY time.. ask yourself this one question.

    "what do I expect him to do with this information?"

    your problem is that you kept this secret from him. You should have told him the moment you cheated on him.

    I think you should tell him that you cheated on him beacuse he cheated on you. You need to tell him WHY you cheated, and that should be your focus. If he's a fair person he will understand.

    HE cheated, and you cheated...

    After you tell him you need to tell him how you feel about him, and that you still love him.

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  • a great man once said "an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind"

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What Girls Said 1

  • You need to tell him, immediately. Why would you do that? He made the mistake and you stooped down to his level, just to hurt him. He has all the right in the world to end things with you, but if he truly loves you, he'll forgive you. You did what he did though, and you had the opportunity to end things, you didn't though. So you're just as much to blame as he is for all of this. Now that you've kept it a secret, he can take it however he may please. You have to be willing to accept the consequences though. You put yourself in this situation now you have to man up and accept it.

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