"Everything was great except?" Has this ever happened to you before?

So about a week ago, my ex and I broke up. We'd known each other for about a year, became very good friends before we started going out and had been dating and together exclusively these past four months. It was my first relationship ever, so you can imagine I was kinda all-in from the get-go. For her though, she's had quite a past with the guys that I think collectively, any self-respecting individual would keep their distance from. So, she found our relationship to be rather different and full of firsts, including kindness and sweetness (her words, not mine). That said... we hit a road bump from the onset that only came up two or three times in our relationship, which she'd struggled with: see, despite having everything she needs in me, kindness, sweetness, sincerity, trust, mutual intimacy (both psychological and physical; again, her words not mine), she couldn't put her heart into it. I. e. *I* could say I love you and mean it, but she couldn't. She was in this state of mind that she admitted didn't make sense in that everything about the relationship was great, except for this lack of deeper emotional connection. This missing, it was like no reason existed for us to break-up (some mistakes on both ends aside) but there wasn't a reason for us to be together? As a result she just ended up feeling guilty cause she felt she was also using me to overcome her own loneliness without giving me much thought for my needs and emotional signs of distress.

We can appreciate each other as people and we're pretty set to stay friends, but I was just wondering: Has this ever happened to you?


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What Girls Said 1

  • It's not you. It's her

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What Guys Said 1

  • As a guy I'd say she's not sure on what she wants. She doesn't know how to react to the type of guy you are because she's never been treated that way. I'd say pull away. It might be days, months, or even years but when she comes to realization she will see that you were the guy for her after all. It sounds corny and like a fairytale but a lot of women don't really see what they have until it's gone.

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