I'm 19 and pregnant and I don't know what to do?

I was in a great relationship with my 21 yr old boyfriend who seemed really genuine and down to earth but it's like as soon as he got me pregnant he didn't want me anymore. He tells me I should get an abortion and I would do it but he's no longer with me and so why do I need please him? Thing is he says if I keep it he'll be there for it because he doesn't want to be a deadbeat dad but he's put through so much emotional pain I don't know if I even want him in my life. I want the baby but I don't want to ever talk to him again. He left me for someone else and all I ever was to him was nice and supportive. But if I have the baby I'll have to keep seeing this guy that broke my heart.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • do what you want to do and don't worry about the guy. Get help with money from WIC and food stamps. He was scared and ran away.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You're going to move on and that broken-hearted feeling will go away. My sister has had two children from two dead beat dipsticks and she has to see one of them whenever she drops her youngest off to see him. She has a boyfriend now, lives with him and her two kids, and has another one on the way. Trust me, you will get over the pain and learn to live your life.
    Now, he may say that he doesn't want to be a deadbeat dad but he might not even follow through with that shit. Either way you do owe it to your child for them to be able to know their father. You don't have to like him, but you should do it for the child.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 10

  • Wow!! What a coward he is!
    You should do whatever your heart says. If you don't want any hassle or baby then get it aborted but if you really want to keep it then consider keeping it but do think of your future as well and its really great that your parents are supporting you. Just don't do anything that you regret later.
    hope it helped
    best of luck!

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  • How long was your relationship?

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  • I don't know, abortion is a serious matter. You must always use condom for God's sake. If you give birth to a baby, you will have problems in your future relationships. I guess you must take an abortion, it is sin but you have to do it, or else you may end up as a miserable person with noone to support you.

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    • Upon birth you can give the baby to someone else if you want and continue your life while other couple who cannot make a child will take care and love him. Think about it too.

  • Sounds really messed up. To be honest, and i know i will be flamed for that, i would get an abortion and LEARN from my mistake.

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  • Such guys are assholes. Before getting in a relationship you should make sure that the guy you are dating won't leave you.
    Pregnancy is an extremely serious issue. So my opinion is just before dating a guy just make sure he won't deceive you in any way.

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  • Give me the baby

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  • Thats problematic. Ask your parents woman.

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    • My parents want me to keep it, they said they'll support me however they could. They don't think I should even consider an abortion.

    • Well there u have it. It okay woman, once the baby born none of it matters. You'l get over him. Wish u best of luck, cheers.

    • I know how scary it is, I was 21 and had no help. To make matters worse my husband left qhen he was 3 weeks old for a fellow female soldier he wanted to be with.

      You know what though 10 years later he's 1 of 3 ligts of my life and i am now with an amazing man who adopted my baby even with special needs. My child made me want more for him so i went to college and ended up with the kind of man i want in his life. You have this, take it 1 day at a time and let your parents help.

  • Keep baby personally I don't believe in abortions unless u really don't want the baby

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  • you can't throw away your kid
    can you?
    you should keep it
    can I ask you if he is a girl or a boy?

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  • If you want the baby, keep it, but you don't have to keep him in your life if you don't want him there. I understand it's his child as well but he has treated you horribly and I don't think he should be a part of your life.

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What Girls Said 15

  • seems like he got what he wanted and he's unable to face his responsibilities and he's making up lame excuses just to avoid facing the situation.

    Do you feel ready to take care of a baby and provide him with love attention and he always here for him/her?
    Also how do your parents feel about the situation? have you talked to them about it?

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    • I know I'm ready to but I also am afraid of everything I haven't done yet. & my parents want me to keep it, they're really happy about it, they don't want me to get an abortion.

    • the good thing is that you have the support of your parents
      now give that little being all the love you can
      wish you best of luck

  • He's an asshole if he left you in such circumstances

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  • Keep the baby but try to keep him out of the loop. If he is not going to pay child support he will not be in the child's life. Or make him pay. You will grow indifferent to him real soon anyways

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  • You have to do whatever is best for you
    Not him and not the baby. You want it or can't kill it? Keep it. Don't want it? Get an abortion. You don't have to see that douchebag or just for a short amount of time but let your child see the father

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  • i think if family suports you and you want this child yous hould have it. Its after all you son/ doughter, who will bring you so much joy and love. if i would be in your place i would love this child ❤ and i am also 19 so i can imagine. good luck to you girl, hope you decide for the right thing 😊

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  • You don't have to keep seeing him if you have the baby. You would just have to file for sole custody of the baby.

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  • do what your heart wants..

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    • what if she wants to run away to mother land africa?

    • Show All
    • I just realized we gave the owner of this opinion like 50 notifications lol

  • that's really messed up... I would keep it because you also have your parents support. my 2 bestfriends grew up without a dad you don't need him. I'm sure you'll find a lovely man who wants you and the kid.

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  • Abortion, adoption or have the baby to struggle for the rest of your life

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  • It's time to pull up your big girl panties. First think of what kind of mother you want to be. While your figuring that out get into school and graduate because you need to be able to support you and the baby with no help. Think of the kind of father u want baby to have anf accept nothing less in a partner.
    Finally, take a deep breath, it's scary as hell but you can do this.

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  • If you have children.. it will be about them now.. not you

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  • Dont have the baby. It'll be the end of your life.

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  • have the baby if u want it GI with what ur hart says

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  • If you want to keep the baby and he wants to be apart of the baby's life then you can't keep him away from the baby. The baby is half his. You will need to take him to court to file for child support. Unfortunately, he will be apart of your life forever because you both share a child. You just have to be the bigger person and make sure you take care of your child and if he's willing to be a father then he has the right to do so.

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  • Please don't get an abortion. That child may not be a completely formed baby yet but he or she still matters. If you don't want the child or you can raise it, then make sure it goes to a good family. I'm sorry this happened to you but please don't abort the child.

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