Just this week I found out my guy was trolling online dating accounts. The day after I found out, he decided that we are broken up. When I asked questions he says that it's because he no longer loves. What you need to know is, we didn't even argue about it. It was a civil sit down conversation before I was no longer able to let the years fall down my face. But still never any yelling. I wanted to deal with it like an adult. We have been living together over a year. I know work has him down, but other than that he's never mentioned that we were in a bad place. We have been so good, and right up until the day I found out he was still his goody, kissy kissy and playful self. It's so out of character.
Why would he does this? Why wouldn't he have talked to me? Why isn't he giving our relationship a chance, he's just giving up? We have our house and life together. He now has literally nothing but his computer now.
If he would actually talk to me I maybe could get answers, but that's not working either.
just a loving girl who doesn't want to lose her best friend and uproot her life :(
Most Helpful Guy
From the first day you both started dating, he was never truly totally into you. All this time he was just hoping he would find what he is looking for in you, and just never found it. You aren't the person he wants and knows you can't be a different person. No point in forcing something to work that your heart isn't into.0
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Most Helpful Girl
I think what's happening here is he knows he is guilty for doing what he did behind your back. The guilt doesn't fall on you but by blaming things on the relationship and saying he no longer loves you is just an easy way out of feeling bad for it. Now you are worried as to what may have gone wrong, why he no longer loves you, what could you have possibly done? Instead of focusing on how his behavior didn't change prior to this happening, he was his usual self with you and no signs of him feeling different about you as one would notice if they suspected their lover isn't giving his all in the relationship. From what you say, that wasn't the case. Things seemed to be fine and normal. Now all of a sudden his behavior has changed once the truth has been brought to light. I would hold yourself together and put your foot down. You did nothing wrong from what you say. I don't know your relationship, I don't know you as a person or him so I can only go off of your explanation. I could be wrong but that's just what it sounds like to me. You have been disrespected as his woman, and the one who should be falling out of love is you for the distrust he brought into the relationship, not him. If he really did fall out of love and he isn't just using that as a way out of his guilt, then I'd say move forward with your life and pay no mind to someone who wasn't considerate enough of your feelings to have come to you to start with if he was really so unhappy with you.0