Is it wrong to enjoy conversations with my ex?

he is married to a woman who stole him from me cause she got pregnant and lost the baby then got married anyway 7 years ago. we are definitely soulmates, we can't love anyone else he is so unhappy we dont see each other we just phone each other as friends occasionaly like when my dad died and on our birthday. he told me he's not able to love his wife like he loved me and im confused? so tell me. is it wrong of me to want to be with my soulmate? and dont you think its so fuctup to be married to someone you know is some other woman's soulmate? i dont understand the cards thats dealt to me


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Most Helpful Guy

  • How would you feel if it was reversed? Would you like your husband talking to an ex?

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    • no its not a nice feeling. but i had to step back for an ex before cause he was in love with his ex and i couldnt do anything about it.

    • This isn't going to change so you have a decision. The fact is if he loved you enough he'd be married to you

Most Helpful Girl

  • No you're not wrong for wanting to be with your soulmate however take into consideration all of the red flags raising on this guy. First of all he cheated once AND got the girl pregnant to boot (supposedly). Now he's married to her and engaging in emotional cheating with you. Forget this guy hon. He's getting the best of both worlds with the two of you and frankly he barely deserves the worst.

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What Guys Said 8

  • 1. He is married to someone else and you should treat him as off limits to you.

    2. He is married to someone else and what he is doing at this point is emotional cheating, right? His wife doesn't know that you two talk, does she? If he must hide it from his wife, it's cheating. If he would cheat on his current wife, he would cheat on you if you were his wife.

    3. She did not steal him from you because you don't own another person. She can't take him from you without his active cooperation. Don't blame her for everything; she is at fault but he is at fault, too.

    4. She miscarried the baby or she was never pregnant and it was a bogus story to "trap" him?

    5. Before she got pregnant, obviously your "soulmate" was slipping the sausage to another woman.

    6. If he is so unhappy, why doesn't he divorce her? Most people do what they want to do.

    7. It is not wrong to want to be with someone who you desire so strongly, but it is wrong to chase after a married man.

    8. If it is fucked up for her to be with someone whose heart belongs to someone else, it is equally fucked up for him to be with her when hos heart belongs to you. That means that he is just as fucked up as she is.

    9. These are not cards that were "dealt" to you. This is a relationship with someone who you selected. This is not something that "happened" to you. This is something that happened as a result of your bad choices.

    10. Life becomes something that you can control when you hold yourself and others responsible their actions. Paint yourself as a victim and you will never assume control of your life.

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  • Drama tools.

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  • If he really felt you were soulmates, he'd divorce her, assuming they have no kids, and re-marry you, so...

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  • either he don't not share the same feelings or he is a weak man not to take the appropriate actions to get what he wants.

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    • yea i won't take any action this depends on him but this makes sense

  • I'm really sorry.. try being honest about your feeling or cut off completely...

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  • I smell a 7 year itch.
    Do not break them up, they'll do it all on their own.
    he could of not married her.

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  • Well no

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  • no..

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What Girls Said 12

  • It's not wrong having friends of the opposite sex and enjoying chatting with them, but you will be the one who gets deeply hurt in the end.

    He left you for someone else and he is now saying he's unhappy with her , but he could just be manipulating you. If he is genuinely unhappy then he would walk from his marriage away , instead of making you feel like there's hope for you and him.

    If he won't leave his wife then it's pointless holding onto the thought you are both soulmates. A soulmate doesn't leave you for someone else. They make an equal effort to be part of your life. Surely you want a guy all to yourself, not a guy who is another woman's husband. A guy who didn't want you when he had you.

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  • Why are u still in contact with a married man.. he's married to her.. the minute he lost the baby with her he woulda been back in your arms if you were *loves lost dream* this is all wishful thinking on your part.. he's using you for emotional support that's all.. and she didn't steal him from you, men can't be stolen! they go on their own accord.. quit dreaming of what might of been and live your life without him in it.. play with fire you'll get burned

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  • So you're doing to his wife what he did to you.
    Men can't be stolen, they can only stray. He was the one who left you for someone else and now you're dipping your own toes into his dirty pond.

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  • Its not a bad thing really and from what you said and there's a strong enough connection to suggest that no else makes you feel the way you do. Drama can flip our lives upside down, but he should be brave enough to choose his happiness with you rather than an unsatisfying marriage.

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  • I understand ur still holding on to him because u probably still love him in a sense , and keeping him as a friend still gives u hope that if they separate then ya can be.. however if a man loves u there's nothing that can keep him from u.. him marrying someone else knowing that ya belong together shows he had. He chose her and not u a baby wasn't the reason, it was an excuse , cause what's together he Eason he still married and there's no children? I say cut ur loses and give room for someone who deserves ur calls.. or to hear ur voice at night or first thing in the morning.. good luck

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  • The woman who stole him frm u how got pregnant anyway? U knw it well

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  • His karma

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  • He's a married man. Leave him alone. Go find another soulmate. I don't believe there's only one, that's some fairytale BS

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  • Course it's not wrong you fool! Lol! It sounds healthy and normal and an example to others

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  • How can a soulmate made other girl pregnant?

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  • nothing wrong

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  • As is the case with most girls kept on the side, he is telling you he is miserable at home, hoping to convince you to sleep with him, when in reality he is perfectly happy at home, and has absolutely zero intentions of ever leaving her. If he was that unhappy, he would have left on his own a long time ago.

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    • Exactly my ex was exactly the same accept his girlfriend just had his baby, I don't believe they were happy otherwise because seriously who does shit like that when they've just had a baby.. Best days of a mans life is the days following his baby's birth.. signs of a fked up sad unhappy man who'll never be happy with anyone.. he was told to get to Fk otherwise he'd find his kid callin some other man daddy... that's the way women should be rather than tryin to point score.. he even pretended to be single.. it wasn't about whether he was happy or unhappy with her it was about keeping me in his web.. that's what some men do they lie.. they are never happy with who they are with they want more and more from elsewhere as well as at home..

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