I left my husband while he had cancer and I can't shake the feeling of guilt. What can I do? Am I an awful person?

We got married young at 20. I'm 23 now. About a year ago, I started getting a gut feeling that he was cheating. It wasn't up until about four months ago that he came out after being out all night, and had three hickies (idk how to spell it) on his neck. He admitted to having an affair with THREE different women. He begged me not to go and I already had one foot out the door once he admitted to the cheating. But a week later, he went for an annual check up with his doctor (his job requires it). And he got some irregular results back. The next thing I know, he's diagnosed with stage 3 pancreatic cancer. He started chemo recently and just looks worse and worse. But I was still angry about what he did and left. It's been a couple weeks since I've left and I started having anxiety attacks. Worried if he's okay and how he's doing. I feel awful for leaving. But I'm not sure if I can go back? Am I an awful person? How do I make this right?
I left my husband while he had cancer and I can't shake the feeling of guilt. What can I do? Am I an awful person?
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