Why do guys hurt me so much?

I was beaten as a child by my father, beaten up by my ex husband and now the man I love is on drugs and although he's not physically hurting me he's treating me like dirt. Why do guys hurt me so much?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You are subconsciously drawn to abusive men, based on your history of parental abuse. Break the cycle.. dump the abuser and run with a better crowd of people and find a "nice" guy.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm not at all blaming you, but unfortunately abuse victims tend to unintentionally seek out abusers. You tend to be more accepting because you're adjusted to it. If you don't accept the behaviour, the less you will see it.

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What Guys Said 12

  • We subconsciously end up doing things and pursuing things in life that we think we deserve, and that leads to self-sabotage. Abuse victims subconsciously seek out abusers because they've come to feel that's their lot in life. You're even talking about your lover treating you like dirt matter-of-factly.

    If we hate ourselves then we will seek out the level of validation and approval we feel we deserve. I grew up with depression and even now I find absolute solace when I'm so down it's unbearable. I feel alive, and I feel that's how I should feel. I find myself craving it, and that scares me. I know I shouldn't want it but I do.

    It's a cycle that feeds into itself, and it's tough to break.

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  • Realise that what is happening is wrong and you do not deserve to be treated like that. Find a good guy, they are out there.

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  • Shit
    I am sorry
    I don't know why
    Most men arnt women beaters or drug addicts
    You've just had some real bad luck

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  • This is a well known problem. The most girls got beaten by there father searching boys who beat them... so now u know this try t avoid this guys... and check if u r wnt him to get beaten or to get happy

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  • Life is very bad

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  • we are not all the same... i come from a pretty tough country and i am the nicest person to females... it the depends in how the guys was taught when he was a child.

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  • doesn't look like anything's wrong with you.. except selection of people you hang around

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    • also they are pretty shitty people, you don't deserve to be tested this way... I wish everything becomes right for you

  • Ask yourself, not us

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  • Because they are all assholes. No one treats a woman like this no one. They dont have refpect

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  • You must see the pattern of men you have in your life.

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  • Will You Marry Me

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  • I want to love you

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What Girls Said 2

  • I'm sorry to hear that. You have to love yourself and know your worth. Don't stay with men who treat you like dirt. The more you stay the more damage you will have mentally and emotionally and even physically.

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  • You're around/used to be around bad people and was stuck in an unfortunate situation.

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