What does it mean when your ex starts seeing someone he knew while dating you?

I was with my now ex for nearly a year. 3 weeks after he told me he loved me, we mutually ended our long distance relationship. Given that he told me he loved me and included me in long-term future plans, I thought he would be single for a little while.

Come to find out, a month after we break up (this is to my knowledge, it could have been sooner), he is going on dates with a girl he met while dating me. I don't want to get back together with him, but it makes me wonder if he always wanted to be with her. Did he initiate the break up so he could be w/her? If not physically, was he emotionally cheating on me? He told me he withdrew from me after I told him I don't know if I can move to where he lives (this was 3 weeks before we broke up). The fact that he's moved on so quickly (in my eyes at least) w/someone he knew while dating me hurts. She's also quite opposite of me in ways that I find surprising that he would be attracted to. She also has one advantage over me: she lives in the same city as him whereas I live far away.

I am trying to cope and move on, but this is the one thing that keeps me up. I know time will heal my pain, but what does it sound like to an outsider - do you think he always had her in mind and moved on too fast?


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  • Pretty much. He was tired of the long distance relationship and he found a girl in the same city as him and they clicked. He already withdraw from the relationship long before the actual break up happened. There is no mutual break up. He broke up with you because he already checked out thus you think he moved on too fast. Sorry :/

    • Thanks for the reply and I definitely agree to an extent. It's a bit confusing because he was the one who said he likes what we're doing (long distance and visiting each other every so often). Unfortunately, I think he got a reality check when I said I was unsure about moving to where he is and compromising my career goals when he said he wouldn't move to where I am and compromise his career goals. Right after that he said he withdrew, but not on purpose. This was 3 weeks before I visited him. On my last day of my trip, I was the one who said I can't do this anymore. When I asked him if he was sure he wants the same, he agreed. Therefore, I call it mutual. It's puzzling because he was visible upset and even cried several times.

    • Just let him go and cut off everything for your well being.

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