Feeling alone, confused, hurt?

So my husband has been very distant with me lately, I'm a woman I trust my intuition and something isn't right. He tries to always turn things around on me and make me feel like I'm crazy. I've been with him since we were teenagers we have 3 kids 16, 14, 11 and now I'm pregnant with our fourth!! (Yikess) I spill my guts to him and tell him how I feel but he just says all I do is nag but all I ask for is his attention the same attention he gives to his co-workers. Lately he's been real distant and sneaky and always on his phone sometimes when I walk in room he is looking at his phone smiling. I have already come to the conclusion that he's gone and it's been over for quite sometime but what bothers me is how he denies it and does it in my face like nothing 18 years 4 kids and like it's nothing to him. Why can't he just be a man and tell me what it really is


Most Helpful Guy

  • Yeah you're messed like you're right baby you probably been gone for a while you sound just like the relationship I just got out of 9 years and she was the same way towards me except for she had three kids and I raised them because i loved them and she took all of them away she ended up cheating on me getting on drugs after 9 years I was devastated. I'm finally at the point now where my needs are getting the best of me on my way and I really need to have some fucking sex so I work a lot so I don't get out much that's why I'm on this site because if I can't get a date at least need somebody to talk too. Sounds kind of pathetic sorry but anyways it sounds pretty bad baby I cut your losses and start over as soon as possible because there's no sense in being miserable


Most Helpful Girl

  • For a second I thought you were actually 24 .. then I started reading more lol

    Talk to him, don't throw in the towel just yet, plan a dinner, get a sitter or (just have a romantic dinner when the kids are asleep) and express your feelings!

    Talk to him and use words that aren't attacking him just talk to him and find out how you guys can get back to that place when you guys were teenagers.

    It could just be that life is mundane and routine for him and he's missing that excitement.

    It could also just be that he misses you as much as you miss him, it just has probably been a long time since he remembered how to show it.

    Talk to him, let him talk also. If you guys agree that you can't agree, then that's okay. Don't talk to anyone thats not in your relationship, because only you and him know what goes on.

    • There's a lot more to the story I have tried and tried and I just feel as if he is over it. I see him as if he feels stuck and he is far from that my kids are a little older and understand and see what is going on I've tried please believe me I have tried I can't just sit there and feel as if I'm holding him down we are still young he is 38 and I am 35 I am a pregnant hormonal mess right now.

    • I'm sorry this is happening.
      I hope things get better for you guys.
      It kind of sounds like you have your mind made up?

    • Well I appreciate your kindness, and I'm a true believer as to everything happens for a reason!! My oldest is a girl and she confides in me a lot and she tells me that she don't see how she can trust a man if her dad has showed her different!! I feel as though I set her up for failure and I didn't protect her like I should have and I always promised myself that I would protect her if this should ever happen.. I have another little girl on the way and I refuse to make same mistake!! Yea my mind is made up and I think I'm just hurting because I spill my guts to him and he gives me this look like it's nothing to over react about.. I'm like a sore thumb at this time in my life but I know I will be ok. Just a bit wounded..

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What Guys Said 2

  • Just like with all other accusations, you need solid proof that he's cheating on you. Because there is still a chance that all of this is just you and not him. Maybe it's a phase he is going through and is not actually cheating. I'd say hire a detective and get to the truth. Confront him and then he won't be able to deny. Simple.

  • I'm sorry. From experience, I'd say to trust your instincts. I've been in his shoes and it was for many different reasons, but I never was a man about it because I was comfortable with her. All I wanted was passion and sexual attention. It gets hard as years together pass. When we did break up, I regretted it for a long time. I'm very sorry.

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    • Maybe, but I think it's over. I can just feel it. Been sloppy for way too long now. And when you get sloppy it's a sign of not caring.

    • Man... I'm sorry... maybe it's not.. he sounds like it's worth it to you to try. I can tell you this.. it will all be better with time. It took me a few years to get over what I went through but all worked out. Just make sure the kids know you guys love them and it's not their fault.

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