My boyfriend is going to join the marines and be gone for months at a time. His sex drive is insane; he has immense amounts of p*rn, he's told me all about the sex with his ex (and how I'm far, FAR better in every way and it's not even comparable) he points out every single girl he thinks is hot, and he wants to be able to sleep with other girls now.
That almost makes sense to me--I mean, I doubt this guy could go for seven months without sex. We've been together for almost four years now, and I know he's not going to change, but this has been a constant issue for us this entire time.
I make him sound like a jerk, but he's sacrificed a whole lot to be with me, and other than this there's never been any reason to doubt that he loves me. He's the best friend I've ever had, and I can pretty safely say he's the love of my life. I'd never put up with this from anyone else, but I'm starting to wonder if I can deal with it for the rest of my life, since we've started talking about marriage.
He has this idiotic double standard where I'm being a traitor if I so much as kiss another guy. In any other circumstance that would make sense, but when I've tried to point out that he's being a piece of crap, he refuses to understand. I've tried to leave him, and he refuses to let go. He's not abusive--he's never said an unkind word to me, and he does everything within his power to keep me happy.
My confidence is starting to suffer, and I'm starting to get jealous because he's the only guy I've ever been with, and sex is still pretty f*cking special to me. There's no chance of him letting me sleep with other guys, and it's almost guaranteed a guy will cheat if he's gone for months on end. I'm getting insecure and psychotic, and I think it might help to be with someone else just once, because this isn't fair.
At this point, I'm still looking for any other way for this to work out, but I'm stubborn and so is he. I'm not comfortable with just sitting around at home, totally devoted to him when he's not to me. Maybe the marines will change him--I doubt you can come back from something like that the same. Then again, maybe he'll see things differently if I'm loyal to him for as long as it takes for him to come home. I'm conflicted.
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If he is around girls that are available... I will be very hard for him to resist. I think you have to settle this before he leaves. You have to or it will be messy. he made a choice to go to the marines but he must understand that it is a big sacrifice for you and not every body is ready and is bound to make this sacrifice.
Or else if he really loves you he shoudl leavethe whole marine thing and stay with you . Why do you have to be the one that sacrifice for him while he is just persuing his goals? A year is a lot. He is expecting you to sit there and never ever kiss or think of a guy for a year!
This needs to be settled now or else it would be messy if any of you discover stuff while you are apart. Even if you .. on your own .. decide not to be with any body during this period.. at least these isn't the pressure of any of you to be only for each other. You are free and he is free.
Somebody with such a high drive is hard to control. Even though he is a good guy .. men by nature want to spread their seed. good or bad the same.
I don't think the marines will change him.. may be will make him more serious but it wil not stop his balls filling with sperm!
Dont be scared... sex and intimicy are your rights and years on is not normal. If it is HIS dream to join the marines then may be he should have done it while single. You are not married to him and he is not some sort of enlisted officer that has had his history there when you met him. It is an active choice and he is dragging you in it.0