Advice on breaking up?

My boyfriend and I met online about a year ago. We have yet to meet each other in person yet, but we had planned to move in together in the next few months. The problem with this is that I don't want to... he's being very pushy about it, and he keeps talking about getting me knocked up even though I've told him I'm not ready for kids. He has really perverted and messed up kinks, and it scares the crap out of me, I'm afraid he's going to hurt me. He seems to always need to talk to me 24/7 even when I need time to myself. I'm really timid and have bad social anxiety, and I don't know how to break up with him. Any advice would be greatly appreciated

Updates:
I broke up with him... I was really nervous and at first it went as well as a breakup could go, which I thought was too good to be true... it was. He slowly increased his messages and is basically blaming me for everything and trying to make me feel bad for him... I'm going to keep ignoring him. Thank you all very much for your help and support! I really appreciate it :)

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Ghost him or quickly tell him it's over and block, get a restraining order if he's actually been manipulative, threatening or scary. Go to family for a while. Change your number. Take any screenshot of abuse that you can, show friends, show family, show authority for restraining order. Do not move in with him consider your own safety.

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What Guys Said 12

  • For your own sake, don't move in with him, and don't even stay in a relationship with him. You should not date someone whom your afraid of in any circumstance, because it is symptomatic of a lack of trust and communication, both of which are vital to a healthy relationship.
    Just tell him that you think you guys should stop there, and whatever he says, just go through with it. Get the support of your friends -- they need to be on your side and understand the situation. Good luck, and be strong!

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  • If he is obsessed with talking to you don't ghost him. Start to slowly pull away until you barely talk to each other then end it with him, that way the risk of him trying to do something crazy decreases.

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  • Listen, the most important thing is communication. Tell him how you feel. If it gets out of hand, break up. But do it with someone involved. Not to speak for you, but to listen and if he starts to act out, they can speak as well. Make sure you have someone with you to witness all of it pretty much

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  • Stay safe please wishing you the best

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  • You should just tell him it's over then block him if he won't leave you alone

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  • Wow. I get how he feels but you gave way to much information to him. Why did you share so many online friends? This is a very complicated situation. He hasn't done anything illegal yet and your worried what might happened if you talk to him about it plus he might begin harassing with messages. You have to be really careful with those types of people. How far away does he live? Like are you in the same country or state

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  • since its purely an online thing it will be easy, just message him with a quick "i dont want to talk to you anymore" and block him on everything and privatize your accounts #beentheredonethat

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    • I wish it were that easy, but he knows my address and we have a lot of common friends he'd most likely use to get to me :(

    • thats scary

  • Be truth and tell him head on. Tell your friend and let them be on the phone while you're breaking up just in case he strangles the shit outta you

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  • Call the police on him from a payphone for a drugbust and then cut off all communications with him.

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  • Don't compromise with yourself.
    It is better to break up now rather than regretting later

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  • I think you need space from him.. Its obvious that we need space from our dearones too..

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  • Yeah, sounds like a red flag here

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What Girls Said 4

  • Show your friends how pushy he is being and tell them how it makes you feel, then ask them to be there for you when you break up with him. If they say no. Pm me and I'll Skype you while you do it. He has no right to be pushy and all that. If he is pushy about knocking you up over the phone then who knows what will happen in person.

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  • He's talking about moving in together yet you've never met?

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  • Why would you even contemplate moving in with a guy you've never met?

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    • It's a long story, but it's just the situation we're in

  • Block him

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    • And ignore him forever... And you should get a bodyguard for the next months

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