What do I even do?

My boyfriend hurt me really bad (not physically) I had cheated on him in the past. He's purposefully tried to hook up with friend by flirting (we both didn't know what each other had did when we did these things) we didn't really take us serious. But now we do, a couple months later he's my everything and I could tell he had cared about me, but now he purposely hurts me, using my past against me, not even just the cheating thing, he makes "jokes" about things I like when he knows it hurts me, we are fine until we fight which is more often then not, it usually ends up with me sobbing and him saying really nasty things to me, and if I don't call he'll text them to me and say I'm ignoring and not calling so I can go cheat, then when he's calming down he says he just wants to talk to me and I left him and he feels lonely and doesn't want to "chase his girlfriend down to talk so just hmu when you want to talk and leave me to be lonely" cause I'll fall asleep way before him. he's an insomniac. We have a semi long distance relationship, we see each other once in awhile, sometimes we fight so bad I think if we were living together it would be more then words he throws at me, i quickly push that thought out of my head and twll myself that eoukd never happen. When we don't fight he's my everything like I said, he's kind and careing, helps me understand my mountains of hw, we're the perfect couple when we don't fight, but when we fight I just feel downgraded and worthless, I feel this way for days even after we make up and he begs me telling me he's sorry, I don't know what to do
What do I even do?
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