Why would a guy treat me badly after I've done everything in my power to make him happy?

He left me after 5 years of treating me badly


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 18

  • Please try to see the logic in my reply hon. I'm not being a dick although initially it may appear that way. I know you are hurt and I take it seriously. The the short answer is go back and read your question and ask yourself why do I even care? The more pressing question would be, "If he was abusive and disresctful, why didn't you get out immediately?" You remained for 5 years however. I'm sorry that someone you trusted and loved was cruel to you hon. You don't deserve that, no one does. The ugly truth is because you let him. I'm not suggesting that you provoked the abusive behavior, I'm saying you enabled it. I know you stayed because in your mind, you convinced yourself that you were in love. You have only yourself to blame for the prevailing pattern of behavior. You set a precedence by allowing the abuse to continue. After 5 years of enduring his appalling behavior there are numerous issues that went unaddressed by both of you. Both of you bear responsibility beyond the first 6 months

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  • Some guys are assholes. That being said, if you allowed him to treat you badly for that long and you didn't do anything about it, then...

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    • I know I thought he would change, I loved him and thought that would be enough but it really wasn't

  • We all learn some hard life lessons on love. You're not alone. You'll find a better guy in the future. And you'll be smarter about to you date too. Best of luck to you.

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  • Excuse my rudeness, but why did you humiliate yourself for five years? Actually YOU are the reason he left you. You should have left him and made him crawl to you, begging for reunion. Instead you let him use yourself. Not smart.

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    • I didn't ask why he left me and I don't think I need a stranger blaming me for ruining a relationship he knows nothing about. I was in love and was unable to see how I was being mistreated until after we broke up, what the question asks is why he treated me badly when I was nothing but good to him

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    • Probably a good thing, thanks!

    • Oh you know what? I'll still say it. He treated you bad because you were blinded with "love" or whatever you call it. He used your weak spot, then used you and now he moved to a better one. I said "excuse my rudeness", so you didn't have to go crazy about my response. Freedom of speech is a thing and I have right to say what I think. If you don't like it, you're very welcome to down vote, or to block me, but don't you tell me what I can say and what I can not. Good luck.

  • Just be patient and wait for someone who will love you the way you deserve to be loved. Forget him. Live your life, do your thing and eventually you'll find someone who will love you!

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  • Always Remember this phrase... "What you allow, will continue" if you let him treat you like a door mat, he will continue to do so, so demand respect and let whoever you're with know that you need to be treated properly or see ya later!

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  • Hmm cos maybe he things that he might not suit u like he things u should get a btter person for u to live long or just ask him why he did that to u.. and settle it slowly and move on.. // if it doesn't work hmm.. text me if u want an advise cos I have been through that too

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  • Because you allowed it. If you don't stand up for yourself your gonna get walked on by more than just him

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  • Sounds like a one sided relationship. Contrary to popular belief you shouldn't spoil your partner or give your all when they are not.

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  • Because u let him

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  • Because you weren't enough for him. And that says more about him then you

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  • Because he's a terrible person.

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  • no idea.
    all i know is that there are 2 sides to each story.

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  • Because he's a piece of shit. Not your fault.

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  • What do you mean by doing everything in your power to make him happy?

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  • Well i woudlnt leave you and never treat you badly but why have you left him treat you badly as well

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    • Well you are sweet! I loved him and thought that would be enough to make it work but it wasn't

    • 5 years is a long time you should have left him earlier

  • ... I think he realized you were too good for him.

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  • Based on your most recent question that was deleted, I would say you were probably the problem, not him.

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    • Oh right, one opinion of my mine defines me as a person and explains the issues of my life and relationships. Thanks!

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    • Who even are you? Find some relevance or please leave me alone

    • When you call all men pussies you effectively label yourself as a POS on GAG, and that is everyone's business. Stop trying to blame others for your shit.

What Girls Said 4

  • He started taking you for granted.
    He knew you loved him and would stick around no matter what. Most men would do anything for that, but sometimes, some really immature guys take a beautiful woman who would do anything for them as a massive inflation to their ego

    He probably started thinking that he could do better - not because you're not good enough, but because you didn't teach him to value you And probably put him on a pedestal which he now believes everyone sees him on - but trust me they don't and he'll soon realise that

    When he does he may try to reach out to you but you need to make yourself strong enough to not give in
    Why?
    Because he doesn't deserve you..
    As you said, he treated you badly for the duration of your relationship so if you think about it, he's the one losing out from this breakup... You essentially haven't lost anything except a person who only took from you... and I think that's a win if anything

    So be strong!
    Cry if you need to, but never in front of him
    Make him believe you're happier and better off without him, and eventually you won't have to pretend anymore coz you'll realize that you really are

    Good luck (: x

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  • Be thankfiul and don’t over think it.

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  • He wasn't for you, you tried and he didn't. You're better off w/o him

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  • He doesn't appropriate

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