Save my marriage and help my understanding please?

This would be a more mature question, probably more relevant in therapy but I would love to hear from you. I sincerely and deeply love my wife, we have been married for close to 5years and have the MOST amazing daughter of 4. She was conceived shortly after we were engaged and although we consciously fell pregnant this event has naturally changed our lives/ relationship quite dramatically.
Ultimately we were financially ill prepared and since then I have honestly struggled to find a sufficiently lucrative enough job to sustain a amazing lifestyle but I did work for a very selfish boss until my wife demanded me to resign. We have never been without food or accommodation or even 1 or 2 luxurious but I did work incessantly for 8 months in trying to improve our financial standing which made her feel I was unavailable.
Currently we have sex every 3-4 months and she seems apathetic to anything more than this and scolds me for wanting more and believing that intimacy could improve our marriage. My question:
Am I wrong for expecting more? How would I know if she has truly given up but is to affraid to admit this due to a fear of being alone and ultimately pays me lip service with a "I love you"?
Save my marriage and help my understanding please?
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