My hurted reading this as I do care about him a lot
Obviously u do care about him , you wouldn't have posted this if you didn't
But why does he say he hates but never says to leave him alone
Mixed fellings, mixed emotions, lack of clarity.
Yeah probably... I want to talk about him but he has blocked me from everywhere what should I do
Show up on his doorstop and ask him?
I don't feel like that is a good idea like I don't want to seem like a stalker or something
Stalkers don't knock on people's doors. They watch them.
I don't know I don't think he would appreciate it
Maybe, maybe not, but then you'll have your answer, and who knows maybe that's just what he needs.
I am scared to get rejectes
Never be afarid of rejection it's just another part of life, it might hurt, but it hurts more the longer you wait.
Do you know what will let me know he still cares?
If He cares wouldn't slam the door on you, if he doesn't he will.
Yeah I know that part but when he says he hates me and says rude things and actually purpossely hurts me... why is his behaviour like this now but a month after te break up he would say he misses me
He's got problems real problems that won't go away until he opens up and talks about them.
Problems like what?
It was like 1 month after break up "I miss you" and 3 months after break up "I hate you"
Emotional problems I can't make any kind of accurate guess.
Who broke up with who?
I broke up
Ah, well I think I just figured it out, he hates you because you left him and didn't come back.
I actually did come back lol he pushed me away
I really don't know, anything else that you might want to add?
P. S. this doesn't mean I've given up, I just need a new angle.
Going back a few messages I notice that you said he purposely hurt you, this could possibly be some type of revenge, though to chase that one I'd need more information, could you tell more about the breakup and following communication? (Only if you want to of course, I know I sound like a PI)
Yeah so... at first we broke up once for a solid 3 days but what we fighted about was just a huge misunderstanding so we got back together. 2 months later we broke up again but never got back together again. But I broke up bc of anger bc he would ignore me all the time and I felt like I wasn't important to him anymore.
So we broke up but still talked a bit to each other I asked him if he missed me and he said yes there was even a day that we talked 2 hours straight. Than he would ignore me again. I tried to talk thing out but he wouls ignore it too... I may have acted desperate but I am so in love with him and when I left him I just wanted him back. Now he has blocked me but I didn't text him for weeks so blocking me on everything was strange to me... now he purposely hurts me in the groupchat with friends but he would never say these thinfs to me privately... he even faked finding someone else and really went that far with making fake conversatiom with that girl who didn't excist a friend just helped him out. He later said it was all fake and his intention was me... now he says he hate me.
Such a complex mess of emotions, by the way this is how guys feel when girls don't give them a direct answer, that said this whole situation is almost backwards, and important thing to remember is that feelings come from perception, and you percecption is always flawed, however you said he was ignoring you, could you discribe that? He seem very confused about his own feelings...
Yeah he mostly ignored me immediatly after the break up I asked him to remain friends but he never answered that question... later on I asked him if he would give us a chance again... he first replied with "I can look in the future"
Later I asked the same question like 9 weeks later and he said "I would give each other a chance but I don't think its the right time"
But than he ignores me again and he would say hurtful things to me and said he hates me
And than blocked me on everything and even said he hurts me on purpose
Of course he hurts you on purpose, the question, as it has always been is why, of course most people don't break up while there still in love, reconciliation is no easy thing, if that is what you hope to achieve then you must go to him and aploigse even for things that for this that you don't you need to apologise for, and don't stop, until he start apologising back, and if you cry all the better, for you speak of love but I hope you know what it is, love never gives up, never stops waiting, never stops forgiving, and never stops trusting, love cannot be broken, and never runs out, so tell me do you truly love him?
I have never stopped loving him but I feel like he stopped loving me.. because there is no comitment from his side and I did apologize but the message didn't get through so I send it on Skype but he hasm't been online for days
Its a messed up story isn't it?
They all are, your's is just extra complicated.
Yeah but I am just wondering if he still cares
When was your most recent interaction? It's takes years to really get over a real relationship, if ever he thinks about you that I know, I what way I don't have a clue.
Interaction in person? I think 1,5 month ago. When he saw me he didn't say hi or even lookes at me. He mostly avoided me. But we were also drinking so we somehow got a bit comfortable around each other and I was at the end in a cuddely mood so I gave a hug to everyone but than I got dissapointed that I couldn't give more hugs bc there was no one anymore except for my ex so he walkes up to me and gave me a really tight en lingering hug he tha lookee in my eyes said "sid get enough hugs" I nodded but he gave me a tight hug again.
Well, that gives me the impression that cares about you, deep down inside at least.
But why would he say he hates me than?
Is this a "I hate you because I love you" or something
That is quite possible, it is possible that he hates you because he can't get over you, accutally quite probable, simple doesn't mean easy, well that looks like the answer to your question, but we can find another one if you'd like.
Okay so he can hate me for that but why would he say and use what he knows about me to hurt me?
Well hate is the exact opposite of love, when you hate someone you want to do everything you can to hurt them, however why he hurts you is not exactly something I would know about, however I do know this, when someone is hurt they more or less do one of two things, the either feel the need to hurt others because they believe the world owes them something or they decide to do there best to never hurt anyone more than they need to, I chose the latter option, but many choose the former, if I had to guess I would say he wants to hurt you because of pain in his life, not nessarily from you, though I would be surprised if you contributed to it. Also he many not believe you actually love him, it's common for someone to say they love someone when they really don't, and many really don't know what love truly is. This is pure speculation mind you.
I get your point maybe something to share we were talking about whatsapp update and thr emojies have changed so I said "one of them is less annoying" so he said "Oh so if I update will you be less annoying? If so I'll update it so I can unblock you" what does that mean
I really wish you I could have answered right away, he annoyed by you in some way, but he isn't against talking to you, are you one of those people who never stops talking?
I stopped talking about us but still talk in the groupchat with him and he also keeps answering to me. Like "I wanna talk to you but I just keep syaing hurtful things"
Well what are you saying that could possibly be hurtful, as I initially said, we all say things that we don't know are hurtful, I have a challenge for you, pay attention to what you say AND how it effects others. Then maybe you'll have a better idea.
I honestly don't think I said something hurtful? Maybe I didn't give him time?
I maybe said "it makes me more happier than someone that used to make me happy"
What about skipping?
Ask him what he means, he'll probably say that you know, if he does tell, him your sorry but you really don't know.
No I mean I said that to him
But He never tells me what he means he never wants to explain
Are you sure?
Yeah I am sure why?
Tell him that if he doesn't explain anything that you can't do anything about it.
I got kicked out of the group...
He said "it is a pity" but wouldn't explain why
Well anyone in there right mind would tell you that he's a jerk and it's not worth your time. But if you truly love him then I'll tell you what he needs is big fat slap of reality, you are worth far more than he treats you as and if he doesn't cut the crap it's just going to get worse, only do this if you think you can actually follow through, tell him to 'cut the crap or it's over', those exact words but only say them if you can actually do that but quite frankly if he doesn't, doesn't really love you and isn't worth your time.
I know for sure that if he will let me come over and talk things out everything will be alright
Then what are you waiting for?
He doesn't want me to explain anything at all nor wants to see me
Then there's nothing you can do.
No I know but I just don't wabt to give up really
If you give up, then he'll be left with 2 options.
And that is?
Well that depends on what he really wants, if he wants you he'll come after you, if he doesn't he won't, but either way giving up is your best option but I would just spend some a hang out with with your friends for awhile.
Yupp I just zoned myself out now for 2 days and he suddenly @ me on the groups snapchat with a meme 🤔 but I left the whatsapp group
Not sure what to say about that.
I mean I left everhthing that ge was in and after 2 days he would @ and doesn't let me go
Do you still want him?
I wouldn't say yes becausr I feel like we have to built thst trust again
With out a doubt, engore him until he comes to you directly.
I am doing that atm
Sounds like you've got this, what do you need me for?
I started ignoring since 2 days before that I just I don't know fellt weird about that whole thibg
Yeah that's relivly normal.
Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions