Is it a bad idea to contact this ex of mine?

Three years ago, I cheated on my boyfriend of four years. He found out and after a short period of uncertainty, we broke up. We tried to see each other and remain friends, but eventually one day he just stopped talking to me (aka "ghosted" me). Since that day we have never spoken again. When I have seen him in public since then, he didn't acknowledge me. I accept full responsibility for what I did, and it was the worst mistake of my life. I could never do that again. I hurt him and myself quite a lot as well by ruining the relationship... and in one way it is worse to know my suffering was entirely because of my own actions. It isn't constant, but I have never stopped thinking about it, and wanting to talk to him just one more time (to tell him I'm sorry, to thank him for the person he was to me for the four years we dated etc). Closure, really. He was the most important person I ever had in my life and I want to be able to get some of these feelings off of my chest? Is there any way I can do this that is acceptable or should I not contact him?


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What Guys Said 7

  • If you turn the page he won't be the most important person you ever had in your life don't look in the rearview mirror look forward in Life or else you're going to miss all the good that's coming to you you're human you made a mistake and chances are you weren't going to end up with him the rest of your life anyway what you're feeling is kind of false in a way because it's a fantasy of what could be whereas the reality of that relationship if it was to have continued what if at all the pitfalls that caused you to cheat to begin with and most of all the worst thing you could ever want to do is be in a relationship where somebody has the upper hand on you because you carry around guilt it's like they own your ass and that sucks so you learn from it start over and you'll find a better match

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  • Dont contact him. It would be best you find a way of closure on your own. Maybe write out a letter with what you would say if you did speak to him. Don't send it. While it's important you find emotional closure it seems he is finding his by trying to forget you.

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  • I don't think you should contact him. You messed that up and should just move on.

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  • Email him a video message that says you would like to talk and why.

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  • I'm sorry it's over and it's done. That's life but maybe you can message him social media wise but he might just block you. It's over and done with, this is a lesson you need to learn from.

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  • He wants nothing to do with you and you will not like the results if you try contacting him. Move on

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  • What do you want to get out of it?

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