He seemed to give up so easily... will he come back?

Hi everyone, so I met this guy a few months ago, we went on a first date and had a great time. I then agreed to a second date. He was away for a couple of weeks with his friends so there was about 3 weeks in between the first and second date. We were texting constantly during this time and he seemed to really fall for me saying I was “special” and he couldn’t wait to see me. We had our second date and it was great, but I was feeling a bit smothered and wasn’t sure. I let it lie though and carried on seeing him and eventually realised I did really like him. So we kept seeing each other about once a week, staying at each other’s and it was great. He asked me to be his girlfriend and I said yes. However, two weeks later he broke up with me. He said he couldn’t give me what I needed and the feeling wasn’t right. I had seen him two days prior to this and everything was completely normal. I noticed absolutely nothing different in his behaviour towards me. I was very confused. The only think I can think of is that he may not be able to commit. I’m his first girlfriend (he’s 27, I am 25) which isn’t a problem for me, but we’d had a discussion about how much time we were spending with each other and I basically wanted to see him more than once a week. I really feel like he’s bailed too soon and just didn’t give it a fair chance. We had so much fun together and had talked about spending Christmas with each other only a few days before he broke up with me. I haven’t spoken to him since (about a week now) and I know it’s impossible to say, but do you think there is any hope at all for us in the future?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Honestly this is going to sound dumb, but: Shit's weird, man. Commitment issues can be super complicated, and while I think that you can push through them together, it's probably gonna suck for a little. I'd suggest just showing him that commitment isn't so scary, it's just putting a name on what you already had. However, do not assume that you understand his issue, because if I may say once again: Shit's weird, man. Just be his best friend and try to work with him and move at his speed without babying him. That's the best advice I got, I hope it helps

    • Thanks for the reply. The only thing is I’m not currently in contact with him and haven’t been since we broke up a week ago. I’m almost scared to contact him again so soon incase he rejects me. You can probably tell I’m pretty hurt and upset by this. I know a week isn’t long in the grand scheme of things, but how Can I Be his best friend if I’m not even talking to him right now?

    • As lame as this might sound, every journey begins with a single step. You just have to make a move, and keep moving forward until you reach the end. The journey is only over when you stop.

Most Helpful Girl

  • The same thing also happened to me. He was the enthusiastic one at first, but after a week after we decided to actually have a relationship, he dumped me. But everything was normal when we met. So I can totally relate to you. In my case, it turns out the guy found another girl to be with. I never contacted him, and he never contacted me since he broke up with me.
    If he decided to walk away, his loss. Even if you decide to meet him again, I don't think it will lead to a healthy relationship...
    I'm sorry honey, but the world is big, there will b a more awesome guy waiting for you. I'm sorry that happened to you. You must have been really confused.


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What Girls Said 1

  • You two are already broken, it is so difficult to build up trust again after a break up. He might have commitment issues but this is something you can't fix and what I realized when I was in a similar situation is that as much as it hurts to let go it is better that way.


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