Have you ever made someone stop drinking, smoking, taking drugs?

A close Friend,boyfriend,husband,father,sister..etc watever anyone.

Have you ever made someone stops taking drugs,smoking,drinking...etc?

How? stories...,advice,anything.

OR Are they that much stuck on it and will never stop taking stuff like that?



Most Helpful Guy

  • You can't stop anyone from doing anything unless you want to go to illegal measures (in most states) to get them to stop.

    What you can do, is influence their mind; most people call it manipulation, I call it being a true friend.

    How to be an influence in someones life:

    1) Mean something to them (have value or "presenece" in their life); if you are a stranger, you don't mean jack sh*t. If you are their brother/sister, you probably mean a lot; same as if you were their best friend.

    2) Know what they are doing and be involved in their life. If you mean a lot and you don't understand what they are doing or why, you probably won't hit the right nerves to get them to stop. But if you know that they spoke pot because their back hurts, maybe a simple back massage might help them quit (obviously combined with their own decision to try to quit)

    3) Show emotion of their actions and how it affects you. If you stay silent and watch them drink, it won't change anything; similarly, if you go drive them home because they've been drinking, it only supports their desire to drink (knowing they have a slave-DD to haul them around while they misbehave).. Instead, if you say things like: "You know, it disappoints me that your..." or sometimes even a blank stare while shaking your head will get the same results.. The point being that you want to stick to the mindset of "I don't like what you are doing, and I'm not gonna stand by and watch while you ruin your life."

    4) Realize that you can't change everyone or anyone. They have to make the decision to quit and to STAY clean. If they can't make both of those decisions by themselves, don't waste your breath - Just give them a business card to the local "AA / NA" groups and advise them to participate in a cleansing program. You can only fight your own battles, there's no sense to carry someone else's burden.

    Look, the truth is that you probably won't succeed with 9/10 people you try this with. The mere fact is that our society is so highly surrounded by different substances that it's rediculous to even think about staying sober - There's coke/crack/meth/speed/roofies/pot/cigarettes/alcohol/... the list goes on for what seems like years...

    The thing that most people "don't get" is that people use substances for a few main reasons:

    1) To socialize

    2) To lessen a past trauma

    3) Because they're addicted

    If you can understand the negativities that influence their substance use, while doing the steps above AND by showing them an optimistic life (Laughter/smiling/etc when they aren't using) - They will have a greater influence to quit.

    Good luck, I hope it helps.. if not, you'll either have to accept who they are or move on. You have to make the choice that best fits your personal desire. You cannot force them to quit or beat yourself up over their choices.

    Take care

    ~ ArtistBBoy


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What Guys Said 2

  • Yes. An ex girlfriend. I stopped her from drinking and a few other things. I didn't force her or ask her to quit. I simply showed her she could be doing something better with her time. Eventually she stopped everything, and is the same to this day.

  • You can't change someone they have to want to change their behaviour...


What Girls Said 1

  • hey, yea my boyfriend smoked weed, cigarets and drank occationly, I always argued and got mad at him when ever he did it so he started doing it behind my back then sum how I found out agian it was making our relationship really bad. so I had enough I broke up w it h him and he noticed what he lost and that what he was doing was not worth loosing me . and I knew it was his friends that kept him drinkin and smoking so I he slowly stoped being friends with them and what made him stop all the way was his best friend movied to a different state recenty so he started to hang out with the better crowed which got him back on track

    • Yeah like he won't go back to those "evil" things eventually. if two people aren't meant to be then it won't happen

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