Are girls like guys?

I was just wondering if girls were the same with guys when it comes to break ups.

I know for me and a few of my mates that when we've broken up with girls we tend to be having the time of our life for a couple of months and then it settles in with what we've lost and usually its too late for reconciliation.

This is semi related to my last post but say you didn't break up on bad terms but you were just enjoying being yourself again how long does it usually take you girls to realize you miss you ex and you want to get in contact with them?

Obviously I understand that there are a lot of times where you don't and you continue to enjoy being single but it would be great to get some inside info on what its like from a girls side of things :)

Yes basically the point I was getting at is are girls to stubborn to call their ex and admit that they want them back? We both kinda agreed on the break up and that we should try having some time apart and starting again but it only took me 9 days to call
her and tell her I missed her. I had answers for this before as she said I don't want to be with you right now. I told her that I didn't want to make her big headed cause I won't always be around but if she changes her mind I'm only a phone call away
She said the same goes for me but I told her I couldn't call her up every week telling her I missed her so I told her I wouldn't be contacting her. I'm keeping it cool and carrying on with stuff but I just wonder if she would have the guts to call me?
So swallow my pride and contact her when I get back from holiday in 2 weeks? (would have been 5 weeks of no contact by then) I know she loves me a lot I don't question that its just hard trying to figure out what's going on in her head :)


Most Helpful Girl

  • Two of my very close friends broke up less than a week ago, so I kind of have both sides of that one. The guy was the one that did the dumping, but he felt bad about it, because it was more an "it's me, not you" situation than anything else. He's spent the time since then surrounding himself with all his friends and partying, but I think that's mostly an excuse to have other people make him laugh and drink himself into oblivion. When he was sober and I was alone with him a few days ago, he seemed much sadder, and he did ask for advice, but seemed very shy about doing so.

    On the other hand, the girl immediately broke down and retreated to her parents' house for a few days. I've been hanging out with her a lot just so she doesn't feel isolated, but also to give her a shoulder to cry on and and ear to listen. And that's what she's been doing - crying a lot, and talking to anyone who will listen about what's going on and how she feels. She misses him a lot, but she's determined to replace that with other people and things. And I think she's actually doing better now than he is - she's being all kinds of social and doing activities and classes just fine, but he's still acting kind of reclusive and ashamed.

    Then there's me and my ex. He dumped me, I was a mess for a few days, but I resolved to get over him and not look back, so I did. He, on the other hand, wanted me back almost immediately (like within a few weeks), so that was kind of a mess.

    Distilled, what I'm saying is that at least in my experience, guys and girls deal with breakups very differently.

    I don't know if this answered your question at all, but maybe you'll get something from it anyway..

    • You seem to be stuck on thinking that she does, in fact, want you back. She may love you, but she may at the same time have decided that you two are better off apart and is in the process of getting over you.

      You sound, actually, a lot like my ex right after we broke up. He and I split more or less mutually, he decided that it was just a break and we'd get back together eventually, and I was receptive to that at first.

    • However, as time went on, I realized that I was just fine staying single for a while, and as he tried harder and harder to get my attention and get me back, it became abundantly apparent to me that he wasn't really who I wanted to spend my life with. He won't accept that I feel that way, and accuses me of "hiding my feelings". Nice. I don't even talk to the guy anymore - he was getting really pushy and angry and it wasn't a good situation, so I just removed myself completely.

    • My advice is to just not contact her unless she contacts you first. If she really misses you, she'll let you know without being provoked.

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What Girls Said 3

  • depends on how much she likes u.. most likey no because we wait for the guy to come back around and begg us. we don't do the asking and repairing. I mean that's not the way things should be but that's just how it works out

  • yahh try comtacting her and telling her your feelings and get her to open up about hers :) trust me it will work

  • well it all depends. if we dump the guy then we usally figure out like and hour to a feww days after. what we are missing. but usally we don't go back and tell the guy that we just keep it to our selfs and expect the guy to notice how we feel(which is one of the reasons we usally don't get back together with our ex's)

    but if the guy dumps us.. we usally no rite away what were missing and we dwell over it for a few months .. and usally we have an instant rebound (we don't rebound to hurt the the guy who dumped us, we do it so we can forget bout them... IT DOESNT WORk )... but yahhh that's what girls do


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