Ex girlfriend pregnant. What now?

I've been dating a friend of 4 years for 21 days now. We talk/text almost non stop and he drives 45 min to see me 3 days a week. Were kinda crazy about each other. The girl he slept with a month and a half ago BEFORE we started dating is pregnant and I told him that if she actually IS pregnant I am going to leave him. He admitted it was a mistake and that he was drunk. Lengthy story short. I think he cried as we continued to speak saying that I was being unfair. Yesterday he told me he loved me and that all he wants to do is be with me... I'm crushed. Opinions? thoughts? would you still leave?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • GET AWAY WHILE YOU CAN!

    I am still in the process of dealing with this mistake because I didn't listen to people when they said that there will be baby mama drama and that he has too much baggage! Now my feelings are stronger and it makes it much harder. You have to realize if the girl is pregnant and he is the father that the two of them will probably always be in contact because of their child together. Also, them having a child together could make old feelings for her come back for him. It's honestly such a dramatic situation for me that I wish I would of stayed away from. Sometimes the girl he got pregnant texts me getting p*ssed off...its so much to deal with!

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What Guys Said 3

  • find out for sure if the baby is his. if it is do not stay! he'll just make your future complicated and miserable day in and day out. have your own kids with the one you'll spend the rest of your life with!

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  • You want to deal with baby momma drama? If not, drop him. He should have pulled out, or used a rubber. We make our own fates. Really irresponsible on his part.

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  • leave him there are plenty of men that don't have kids

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What Girls Said 6

  • Yes leave, it's too complicated and you don't want to get tied up in his problems the last thing you want is for you to get knocked up too and have him leave you (even though they always say they won't THEY WILL)

    You're too young to have to deal with this crap, you're hott, get a guy with less bagagge and tell this guy to try again with the baby mamma. Every child needs a father.

    And maybe in 5 years, when the kid is older and your both single (I doubt you'd be) then try it again.

    But for now...

    RUN

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  • Wow I feel sorry for you :( well I ended up having a baby with a guy who already had a 5 year old daughter. There is nothing special about it! They already been through it all so when it comes a time in your life you will be experiencing it alone basically because he already experienced it once! It makes it less special on your part! so I would leave him if I was you, I wish I had not messed around with a guy who had a kid! It is a lot of Baby mama Drama for sure! I have his ex calling me all the time and won't shut the hell up and likes to talk forever and at one point my husband quit his job because he had to pick his daughter up from school and his boss didn't like him having to take an early day off every day! why? because I guess her work was more important! plus I deal with things like her calling threatening me one minute that I can't tell her daughter what to do if she is putting holes in the wall then the next minute when my husband takes off and I tell her to come get her then all the sudden I have responsibility? ohhh only when its convienent for them! oh! BULL SHIT! IT IS A LOT OF DRAMA! IF YOU WERE SMART YOU WOULD TELL THIS GUY THAT IT IS ONLY RIGHT THAT HE WORK THINGS OUT WITH HIS EX SINCE THEY ARE HAVING A BABY AND THAT GETS YOU OUT OF IT EASY! LOL Other than That I wish you luck! I'm not bi but your a pretty girl and you will find a guy who will be next to you having your first baby and it will also be his ;) Oh I forgot to mention!... ORS took our HUGE tax return this year and it was also my income! I was so p*ssed! I have a baby too lol dumb asses! Yeah CHILD SUPPORT? IT SUCKS BALLS! LOL excuse the language! I wish I wouldn't have had a baby with him! I'm gonna threaten to take him for everything if he don't sign her over! lol

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    • Well thanks for your response and wow....yea hope things look up for you too.

  • He has to take responsibility if it's his baby. Doesn't mean he has to marry this girl or even be in the same city. He just has to provide for this baby's welfare. That should have nothing to do with your relationship with him. If he is choosing to go back to that girl - be a Dad to this baby and the whole nine yards... well, I am sorry but I do not see you in his future. Good luck.

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    • PS I may be a little "RUDE" for your taste...... but you are a little naive for mine. What happens with this guy, this woman, and new baby..... is not your concern. If anything - you should be supportive of him instead of getting upset. He was not with you when this happened. Sorry you are upset -- but he's got bigger problems than your getting upset.. What is he supposed to do about it? Make sure YOU two have condoms. Good luck.

    • Agree to disagree... I am NOT naive..

  • PS Didn't you say he dated this girl BEFORE YOU? You really don't have much of a right to get mad. Sorry. He was not with you as a "girlfriend" at the time this girl got pregnant - according to you?

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    • Thank you for your response. I'm not mad AT him.. I'm upset with the situation...

    • You think YOU are upset at this situation? You are NOT involved in this, whatsoever. This boyfriend of yours chose to take off his pants and have sex with a woman with NO protection when YOU were not in the picture. Sounds VERY irresponsible. Take note. You are just jealous that this girl is having HIS baby.. Think of the baby.. Be supportive of this child. Keep your own feelings SEPERATE. This isn't about YOU. Sorry.

    • Okay... I tried to be nice... but you are a little to rude for my taste.. First off I did LEAVE this guy so he can be a GREAT father to HIs child. I have every right to be upset about the situation because I indeed have feelings for him. I felt like we connected in ways I don't with most guys. He was taken away from me. OF COURSE I'm upset. My

  • leave him

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  • Hi there, I am now in the same situation you are. I also dated a friend of 6 years for about 8 months and at one time we broke up and he slept with an ex but we got back together afterward and now she is pregnant. We both agreed that it will be for the best to end our relationship because of the child, but it isn't easy for me to let go of him because I am still in love with him. Please tell me how things are going with you right now?

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    • She hasn't had the baby yet. I didn't leave though. I don't think you are supposed to let go of people that are good to you because of a mistake. I have accepted the fact that this relationship might crash and burn but hell he loves me so I'll try.

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    • If he is fighting for his kid. I would let him be. He needs to be able to balance the two of you but since he's being vocal about wanting to focus on the kid. I wouldn't stick around other than as a supportive friend.

    • Thank you for the advice - appreciate it. Hope that everything works out for you. Strongs.

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