How long do you wait to reach out to an ex?

We broke up and I would honestly would like to maintain a friendship. It was a clean and mutual break up we both became very busy and things starting falling through the cracks. Is it OK to reach out? if so how long do I wait?
  • 0-3 months
    Vote A
  • 4-6 months
    Vote B
  • Ummm....never
    Vote C
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Thanks for the opinions...I think I'll leave it as is. :)


Most Helpful Guy

  • there is no time limit on how long you need to consider a few things first

    1) can you stand seeing him with another girl

    2) if you were to be out with your new guy and you had a double date with him and his new girl, could you sit behind them in a drive in movie and see him go in for a kiss towards her, or would you even be able to go on a double date

    3) can you two be around each other without feeling weird, understand you're only friends, not hook up and be OK with what has happened?

    if BOTH of you can answer YES to all of those questions, yorue ready to be friends...otherwise you're lying to yourself when you say you are ready to be friends...the key point here is you have to be completely over that person and understand you and him are on different paths, meeting different ppl, until you are not phased by his choices and decisions and actions then you won't be need to be over him and he needs to be over you...understand?

    hope this helps - again there is no time limit, it all depends on the BOTH of you

    • Very good things to consider. I had to ask myself all those things before I was ready to be around my ex again. I found that it took over a year before we got to that point though, and it was easiest to get there through MINIMAL to NO contact actually. I found that if we talked to soon, all the healing I did brought me back to ground zero. Give yourself lots of time and focus on what you have to do to be happy, healthy, and successful in your life.. without a relationship. Hope that helped too.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • It depends a lot on the reasons. If it was because he cheated on you or he treated you like crap, then I don't see how becoming friends with him will make any sense. But if it was because you were far apart, or because you guys made the wrong decision (that is you though there was love when in reality it was just a friendship) then its okay.

    • Well he just stopped talking to me. For no reason. I still want to be friends but he acts like he's to cool....I just wanna be civil.

What Girls Said 7

  • I think becoming friends with an ex will bring more harm to you than good. You may truly believe that you're 100% over him, that is until you actually see him in person with his arm around another lady. It's healthiest to just move on and spare yourself the hurt of trying to make amends when really the past is the past.

  • they are your ex for a reason. they are no longer part of your personal life

  • Do so, if you feel like it - but it is better to find other friends.

  • I've only had one and it's been almost a year so ya


  • i don't keep contact with people I break up with.

  • I would let it go as friendship in my experience is unrealistic (especially if you've slept together).

  • go for it.

    for me, I usually wait until a holiday or his bday or something then use that as an excuse to ask him how things are


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