What would be the reason for not responding?

I've been dating this guy for 10 months and we had mutual(?) break up. We had broken up once after 4 months into our relationship. His reasoning was "He felt he was only one in the relationship, He felt, I wasn't giving him any attention". And couldn't handle being hurt emotionally. Second time around, Although, we never argued or fought. Things just weren't the same. I enjoyed every second time spent with him and do care and love him but I wasn't happy in a relationship. I was losing myself. Like I am there but what makes me wasn't (perhaps I was trying too hard. always thinking about how his moods are and what he is thinking, like sittin on pins and needles). And, I started feeling a change in him too. When I initiated the talk (how I felt) to get some type of solution. He clearly said he didn't wanted our relationship to end and that he feels I am the one with a doubt and with the answer and just two weeks later. He ended with "feelings just aren't there" (via phone). Although, it was hurting me to think this was the end for us. I didn't want to argue, plead or beg to work things out. I just agreed/accepted.

Couple of days later, I went to his place to get my things. He held me tight and when I broke away from him, He was crying. why? guilt? Up to this point. We are talking and when I asked "what changed?" he sudden got COLD and he didn't want to talk about it. I stopped there. Then again, when he walked me out to my car (who just was so COLD). He started tearing up and soon crying. I kept my visit mutual and calm. No arguing, no blaming, no begging or crying on my end. We parted with smiles on our face. Thanked each other for the good times etc. Told him I love him and he told me he loves me too. When I mentioned perhaps much down the road, he responded with "we will see". But we both know it is over.

Since the break up. I haven't called, texted, e mail or anything. I needed some time to sort out my emotions. Been two weeks since the break up. I've noticed that his daughters (doesn't live with him) b-day was coming. I thought hard, if I should e-mail him to wish her a b-day and thought, It wasn't something I be bothering him with and considering our break up wasn't a bad one. So, I e mailed him. I just said, It is her b-day and since I have no way to call her in person. Please tell her that she is in my thought and that I wish her a wonderful b-day. and added that his new job is treating him well. That's it. I guess, I kind of expected no response but same time, sample "thanks" wouldn't hurt?

What would be the reason for not responding even out of consideration? Again, I haven't contacted him since the break up which been 2 weeks. (not 100% sure on this but there might be another woman. Just a feeling)

Any advice/opinion is very appreciated. Thanks

thanks (we both are in our 30's)


0|0
01

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Simple question. Do you think you were giving him enough attention? If so, please back it up with examples.

    0|0
    0|0
    • 1st time. He broke up with me. Not that I didn't cared. I just didn't know how to express them. After 2 months of being apart. We got back together. Things were okay. I was not chasing him but def. made myself known that I was with him and he knows that. He even said he knows how much I care and love him and that everything I have done he apprciates and noted. Problem was. I wasn't attracted to myself the way I was becoming. I had hard time being just me.

    • It sounds like you weren't putting as much effort into the relationship as he was and it upset him. He may have wanted someone who was open and forthcoming, but you had a hard time providing that. Saying you had a hard time being yourself likely means that you were afraid of showing your feelings for him. And if you can't show you feelings to your boyfriend, who can you? Have you had bad experiences after revealing your feelings to someone? You may be an emotionally shielded person.

What Girls Said 0

Be the first girl to share an opinion
and earn 1 more Xper point!

Loading...