My best friend always ditches me for his ex?

Jon and I have been best friends for the past 5 years.

We are really close and he's a great friend.

The only problem is his ex girlfriend.

They dated for about a year, but broke up because they never got along. They had a very unhealthy relationship -- fighting all the time. It ended with a pregnancy and she had a miscarriage. Because of their unhealthy relationship it was awkward to hang out with the two of them together -- there was always tension and they just never seemed to click. Because of this her and I never really got along. She was rude to me on several occasions.

In their relationship he always chose her over me.

I understand he cared about her, but we'd barely see each other because they would spend all this time together. I told him it bothered me and he never seemed to understand. I was always thinking "Why does he never hang out with me especially when him and his girlfriend have such a bad relationship?" Sometimes he'd try to remedy the situation by all three of us hanging out, but since it was so weird they way they got along I never felt comfortable. There were at least two things when Jon and I had plans, but he completely bailed out on me cause I didn't want her to come by.

Anyway, they started hanging out again and it's the same thing.

He doesn't get call or text me back as often as he used to and he always hangs out with her over me. They aren't even dating right now, just hanging out again.

I am upset cause my "best friend" cares more about this girl who he clearly is not compatible with then me. What do I do?

I am not trying to be a drama queen, but he's a great friend and it hurts me that he can't be a little more realistic about all of this.

Thanks!

T


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Most Helpful Girl

  • i understand where your coming from, when one of my closest friends started dating this guy I would get angry that she would always blow me off for him. but if you too had a girl who you were deeply in love with you would understand his situation. I now have a serious boyfriend and we spend a lot of time together and my friends have taken a back seat and that's just because I expect my friends to still be there when I need them. its not that I like them any less its just the love for my boyfriend makes me want to b with him all the time and I'm not obsessed with my friends the same way lol. please don't get offended by his actions he is trying to juggle both but the girl gives him a tingle in his stomach that he just can't get from a friendship. try to stick with him and find yourself a partner or a hobby and when you both are free you can meet up. this is just what happens as people grow up, you c less of each other, what du expect to happen when you both get married and have kids?

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What Girls Said 2

  • Just tell him every single thing you just told me. maybe even just let him read this. He will understand if he is really your friend after reading what you wrote here.

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  • maybe you should ask him to get a new girlfriend and tell him that you'll help him.

    Then once he has a new girlfriend, he'll also invite you and you won't have a problem with it because hopefully you and his new girlfriend get a long.

    and she was rude to you? ask your best friend if she really dislikes you and is telling him to dislike you too. that maybe the problem. good luck

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What Guys Said 1

  • Gotta say, sounds like a little bromance going on here.

    I know it's supposed to be bros before hoes, but here's the thing dude. She has a vagina. You don't. You're fighting a losing battle. It's like nuclear weapons against natives with bows and arrows. Best thing you can do as a friend is be supportive. That doesn't mean you have to like her, but don't hold it against him because he has bad taste in women; unless you're ready to stop being friends.

    Might also consider getting your own woman so you don't care so much who he's hanging out with.

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    • I have a woman.

      Thanks.

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