Why does my ex still want to be friends?

Okay so my ex broke up with me 3 days ago and it broke my heart because i really loved him. But when we broke up he said he really didn't want to be in a relationship rn but he hoped to date in the future , and he wants me to stay in his life. Yet to this day he calls me babe , babygirl etc but im confused? Why would u break up with me and still call me babe , want to talk to me more , send me hearts etc & what’s the difference when we were perfect together

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Because he wants to have sex with other women and have you as backup sex.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Probably he wants to have his cake and eat it too. As in he wants to have you there to fill his needs (what ever they may be from companionship to having sex) but at the same time he wants to be able to date other girls and enjoy the benefits of being single. DO NOT GIVE HIM THE GIRLFRIEND BENEFITS WITHOUT A RELATIONSHIP IF RELATIONSHIP IS WHAT YOU WANT!!! And I mean that!!! One could think "but how else would he change his mind about it" but that's sooooo not how it goes. Why would he want a relationship if he gets what he wants and more without being in one, without having any responsibilities. Not saying this is what you're doing but just a warning.

    When/if you're honestly fine with being just friends with him and don't feel like you'd want anything more (+he's not trying to get anything more) and don't mind him dating and sleeping with other girls, then there's no problem (well maybe ask him to cut the babe stuff if that's bothering you). Before that I'd suggest backing off, trying to move on (even if that wasn't what you want at the moment, it's way healthier than staying stuck on something that's hurting you), heal yourself and let him miss you.

    Take care! ❤

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What Guys Said 1

  • He wants to stay friends because he's sick of you but not sick of fucking you

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What Girls Said 11

  • doesn't want to be in a relationshi rn?

    He doesn't see you in his future but maybe you have good qualities and he wouldn't mind being friends. Still, being a friend after having all that sucks.

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    • I mean we talk like nothing ever happened, like he always wanna kiss mee touch me yet we still trade picks im just confused why we just wanna be friends rn

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    • Yeah thats why im just gonna cut him off i think he's just wants me wrapped up on his finger just in case his nEw GiRl dosent work out 🤷🏻‍♀️

    • @Asker, there u go. All the best for you tho.

  • He may still like you but not like something about his relationship with you. For example - he may think you are too clingy or he may not have time or money for you

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    • He told me he still likes me , that he loves me and that he misses when we went out but right now isn't a good time for a relationship:/ really confusing huh. He probably dosent have time

  • He’s keeping you hooked in case his next interest doesn’t work out.

    Cut. Ties.

    You don’t need him and his indecisiveness in your life. You may have loved him but he doesn’t respect you.

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  • Not ready or affraid of commitments? Guys can backtrack when things get too serious or they don't know what they're really feeling. I don't do well with wishy washy men, so friends is a big NO. Its all on you and where you set your boundaries. Calling you Babe is fine (if you're fine with it). But does Babe do all the previous without the girlfriend label because if that's the case you just opened yourself up to be downgraded to friends with benefits.
    Also, he may know that you're emotional so maybe he's thinking this is helpful when it's not. I say either talk it through to see where he's really at or give yourself a break... at least 2+ weeks with minimal communication to see where you're at.

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  • He may need time to organise their life. Feeling overwhelmed.

    The question is are you welling to put your life on hold until he is ready ( bad idea) or move on and may find someone who thinks the timing is just perfect for the two of you. Your ex may snap and get his act together if he really cares and thinks he will loose you.

    I'd suggest to go for the no contact rule and see what happens.

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  • My guess is he's being a douche bag. He wants his cake and be able to eat it too, meaning he's not gonna let you get far from him because he likes the benefits of having you around. Don't fall for that crap, you deserve better.

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  • It's unfortunately a form of emotional abuse. He keeps you at arms length so he can have his cake and eat it too.
    I know it's hard especially if you truly love him but cut him loose. You don't deserve that type of emotional manipulation in your life.

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  • He's afraid of commitment... Maybe he's just toying with you or testing if you really love him...

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  • Sometimes guys feel trapped in a relationship.

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  • He still cares about you

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  • He's not committing to you. he's keeping you as an option. He probably is interested in someone else and not sure how things would go with (he/she) yet so he's keeping you on the hook

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