How long should I wait?

All right, check it. I'm interested in this girl, who I just got back into contact with after about 2 years of silence. Her boyfriend of 4 years broke up with her three weeks ago, and I know for a fact that their relationship was sexual.

Anyway, I've been flirting with her, and her reactions are ambiguous to say the least. She says it's because she's not over the relationship yet. In a possibly related note, she's an extreme tease, by her own admission.

So my questions are these: how long should it take before she'll be over it? Are girls usually over it at this point, or is this normal? Or is she indicating that she has no desire to date me, and that I should just pack it in and cut my losses?

I'm thinking of waiting another three weeks or so and officially asking her out. Does this sound reasonable? I'm not willing to wait forever, but I do understand she may need some time. So what should I do?

If any more info would help to clarify my situation, let me know.

  • She's not interested; just move on.
    Vote A
  • She needs some time; just be patient.
    Vote B
  • Other (please explain in the comments)
    Vote C
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
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New update: the topic came up earlier than intended. She's definitely willing to date me, just not now. She told me she'll let me know when. Good news for sure. Thanks for your help, everyone.


Most Helpful Girl

  • It takes different amounts of time to get over that kinda thing... if he broke up with her it might mean she will take a little longer, especially if she was not expecting it. I just broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years about 2 months ago, and I was over it then, but he still hasn't let it go, so I think it depends on why the break up occured. If she was not prepared for it then its completely understandable she's not over the relationship. She wouldn't be indicating she has no desire to date you. It'd be better if you let her get over it, so when you guys started a relationship she wasn't feeling unsure. Don't cut your losses if you really like her, just give her a bit of time :)


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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • not really girls will sometimes not be over guys they were with for years for months but seeing as I was in the same thing I can say from exprience that I found a guy I dated for 5 months after my ex of 4 1/2 years cheated on me an dumped me an well the guy I was with for 5 months well he got scared an well he stated he wanted to be just friends so I can tell you that if she don't show an interest in you then you gotta show her ... sometimes it works out sometimes he don't


What Guys Said 1

  • If you did it for her, she'd date you the next day. Even if for nothing but jealousy purposes. Don't wait around on her. If she wants you, she'll play chase. Stay busy like you don't care about her. She'll let you know.


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