How can I ever get over this...need someone to talk to?

Me and my girlfriend of 3 years are about to break up again. this making it the 4th time. every time it was her breaking up with me. I love her more than anyone can ever imagine. and the last time we got back together she came crawling back to me and because I love her so much and I guess I'm a sucker I listened and took her back and it was amazing for 3 months and now she's doing it again...i must be the biggest sucker on the planet. I can't imagine ever be able to get over her...I'm sick to my stomach and have puked over and over...worst experience of my life...i don't know how I'm ever gonna get over it but I cant...i can't do it I'm at my lowest state...idk what to do with myself but I'm thinking the worst..just need someone to talk to...thanks


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  • This is going to be tough, but break up with her this time and try making it look as though you don't really care anymore. She suffers from something I see in a lot of people these days (especially girls), which is when someone gets something to easily, they begin taking it for granted. In this case, she sees how much more you love her, and because of this she chooses not to respect you. Because you love her so easily. Lots of people like that, and it's a very stupid behaviour. I bet she is an extremely small-minded person. In fact, I bet if you took a step backwards and saw this from an external point of view, you might even realize that you don't really have that many concrete reasons to be in love with her, and that you can do A LOT better than her.

    You can do a lot better than someone who breaks up with you and comes back crawling when she realizes she didn't manage on her own. That's the bottom line. You can give them a second chance, but this isn't even the second time she's done this.

    So this time, show her you don't give a f*** - tell her you're done and that you can do better than someone like her. I'm even willing to bet that's the truth, without knowing nothing about this chick.

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  • Dude. me and you are like... identical. Girlfriend for 3 years, she broke up with me in December 09, came crawling back in February 10 and we were happy (at least I though 'we' were) and she broke up with me at the start of August. I was a sucker, clearly. And a couple of fights in between so me and you are similar in situation.

    I know what you mean... People don't get it. It's such a long time 3 years and it's not good enough to say "time heals" but I still love her too. We haven't spoken since she broke up with me and in fact I haven't seen her since then either. If I were to give any advice, it would be to do the same. Avoiding her makes it easier because you don't have to see her with anybody else or moving on (which will obviously make you want her more...)

    It's been 2 months since we broke up and every time I think I see her, my heart jumps and my stomach turns. It's not going to be easy.. Just don't fall for her if she comes back... have some time to yourself, discover who you are, and whether you really love her or not (I assume she's your first love too?)

    If, in the future... a couple of years later... she comes back? You will be emotionally stable enough to cope with it and decide whether you want to start over or not. But obviously don't think this far ahead yet.. Focus on yourself first.

    Distracting your mind works wonders. As I'm typing this, I'm on the last episode of season 1 of Lost! I'm planning on rewatching all 6 seasons! And then watching as much Chuck as I can, and all my other favorite TV shows too. Episodes are an hour long each... so a whole season could take you about a week to watch.

    You might call me lazy... but I have no motivation at the moment to do anything else. Once I feel motivated enough - I will exercise (as I hear this is the best way to find happiness, because of the endorphins you release and it will just make your life happier in general)

    Talking to people helps too... I guess if you can get counselling or just a friend to listen, you can vent all your problems to them and work out a solution. Of course, this site helps too :)

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    • You're pretty wise for your age.

      I think you're gonna be a very happy guy in life, even if you feel crappy now.

    • Wow thank you...its really ruff I recently moved because of college and work and so we have maintained a relationship with only seeing each other on weekends so I think being 3 hours away from her therefor having no chance of seeing her will help this is just a terrible situation...i feel sick and I hate this....thank you

    • Wise enough to give enough, not wise enough to take my own though :P It's hard work trying to get over long term loves. But yes, being long distance helps a lot too I guess. I deleted my Facebook and Twitter because she would be on there if I kept it (or her friends would be, if I just removed her...) So that's the extent of my lack of communication. Properly cut all connections.

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