How do I get over him?

He hurt me and I still love him. I know I need to move on and stop thinking about him. I like thinking about him and I'm still in love with him. How can I stop thinking about him! And get over him! It seems impossible


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Most Helpful Guy

  • First of all if the relationship is definitely over and you need to stop thinking about him, then you should be No Contact for a significant period. It sounds like you may be but I'm not sure.

    After that, I don't think there is any way to force yourself to stop thinking of him. It would be like saying "don't think of an elephant." The trick is really to do the opposite and just stop stressing over the fact you are thinking of him. It will happen. Just let it pass through you as much as possible. Much like in meditation, we just let the thoughts pass and focus on our breath.

    Remember too that the thoughts may seem to be about him, but really he is just a projection screen for your own issues and desires. So constantly ask yourself what it is you're using him as a screen to look at about yourself.

    Try to really investigate what's under the feelings. Your mind tries to focus on you on him because it's easier than looking at yourself inside. But try to take what you feel toward him and use it to look inside.

    If you do this, you will find that over time you do think of him less and it becomes easier. Like a boiling pot, if you just give it time and space it will suddenly boil and you won't even realize how it happened.

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What Guys Said 3

  • It really depends on your situation..you didn't say much about your story. Are you still connected with him on Facebook or anything like that?

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    • Ya he is on my FB but we don't really talk.... but it doesn't matter its just that I'm still IN LOVVVVE WITH HIM!!!!! and I want to get f***ing over it!!

  • I mean, are you guys still in contact with each other? You guys go to work or school together?

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    • No no I'm studying and he's working

  • Where is he now?

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What Girls Said 3

  • it is really really hard and it's going to take time. it's important to remember that a time will come when you will feel better. it won't always be this hard. and in fact when that times comes somehow things will be even better than they were before.

    in the meantime, talk to your family and friends, it helps to get it out of your system and to have some people supporting you so that you don't feel too alone.

    it takes a lot of patience.

    good luck, be strong

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  • I am going through this right now. It hurts, yeah. I suppose you should let time take it's course and in the meantime try and do other things to ocupy your mind and keep you busy. Read, watch TV or go out with friends.

    I find that sitting at the computer does not help at all. So try go out and do something.

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  • the best way to get over a heartbreak is to move on. you can only do that given time.

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