It's been almost four months since my ex-boyfriend broke up with me. We were together for six years and lived together for almost four years. Last Christmas he broke up with me because he was neglecting his friends and that I was very jealous over his friendship with a co-worker. During our relationship he insisted that they were just friends and wanted me to be her friend too. Well after he broke up with me I moved out of the house but then we were together again but I kept living in my new apartment because I wanted to take things slowly. He broke up with me again after 5 months together because he started to hang out with this girl again (and I found out some e-mails of them of feelings they had and sexy stuff they had done) and I started to fight a lot when he said to me that if I wanted them to cut their friendship he would do it for me. On the other hand, for the last months we were together he started to distance himself from me, he didn't want to spent a lot of time with me because he said we would started to fight, he didn't wanted to share stuff with me, I just thought that he was preparing me for the break up. When he broke up with me, I decided to go NC because it was the only way for me to cope with this and get over it. He wasn't happy for my decision of NC but he said that he would respected it. Well like a week after we broke up he started to send me e-mails every week for the last 4 months of stuff he saw on the Internet that I liked, his opinion on current events, about how important is to him my opinion on things that he has done professionally, music videos that I might like, messages about what he's been up to, about his new job (that I got him), about places he went and thought he was going to see me, about how he wishes that I could reply his messages. I don't reply to any of his messages because he's just acting like anything wrong happen. He hasn't apologize for his cheating (he doesn't accept that he cheated on me and said that those messages were jokes, yeah right) and I don't think that he should have me for emotional stuff or his personal journal. I'm really hurt because we share a lot of things together, we share the same interest, same taste in music, books, movies, politics, etc. After all I think I'm handle it quite well because I have been focusing on work, on my Ph.D., and even though I don't have lots of friends I just try to hang with them when they can. I think I have been okay because he writes me e-mails every week. And even though I don't reply to any of his messages and think it makes me feel good that he is thinking of me, but it also makes me think why he writes me all those things when he was the one who broke up with me? Why he keeps writing me when he knows that I'm not going to reply at his messages? Why he sent me a t-shirt of his with his perfume on the date that should have been our anniversary? What does he want from me when he said that he wanted to be alone?
Most Helpful Guy
Keep doin what you are doin. Don't break it. Do what you need to do to get over this guy. I'm very proud of you for not giving in. Most girls would and I think he is just approval seeking to be honest. He seems to want to maintain some form of communication in order for him to have enough confidence to go out and date again. What I read was that he cheated with this girl, and I bet she probably realized that there really isn't special about this guy and ditched him. Which would explain why when he was talking to her, he didn't want to to be with you.
Ph.D wow very impressive. I think you are a very smart girl that is focused and doing the right thing. Stay strong and work on moving on, because it willl be well worth it.0