Guys- being friends with your ex?

I have heard that guys can only be friends with their ex's to keep them around in case... but is it possible for guys to want to be just purely friends with an ex?

Updates:
and if not, WHY?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well here is a two part answer:

    Yes they can, if the break was mutual and not messy sometimes it is possible. But this is almost never the case.

    Why can't ex's just be friends?

    As it goes most people still harbor feelings for people they were in relationships with, and they find it very difficult to leave their feelings behind when their old love is seeing other people. Many people also take such breaks very personal and try to pin the blame solely on the other person and that often leads to toxic feelings towards the other person.

    In short unless both parties are mature enough to put their old feelings aside it is close to impossible to just be friends with an ex.

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    • I don't care about a guy not being friends with me after a break up. It all depends all you define a 1.friend- hangout buddies2. friends with benifits 3. just every blue moon speak to each other through text or email.(hirthday)

      Some ex's don't even do the 3rd option. Why guys don't even do the third option? Is it because they don't care at all or ist because they....I don't know...What do you think?

    • If you left on a good note then that may be a possibility, but if it was messy then it could be that the person just wants to move on and forget. I talk to a few of my ex's but it took awhile (4 years) before I talked to one of them. Sometimes you have to let time heal some of each others heart before you are willing to talk civilly to each other.

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What Guys Said 3

  • I am not really in favour of keeping your exes as your friend s for 2 reasons

    1> it is extremely difficult to forget the old feeling of love and attachement with somone. It will be really difficult for both the partners to see the exes seeing other people and looking too happy.

    2. (and this one more important) This is extremely disrespectful for your new boyfriend/girlfriend to find out that you are still conected and befreind to your ex/exes. This will make them feel unsecure and will have extreme difficulty trusting you.

    I think most of the girls and guys keep their exex as friends to make them feel jealous and showing them how happy they are with their new partners. Also, on the other hand it works for them for keeping therir new partners on toes for providing and pampering more by feeling insecure that if they do less then expected, they will loose you. Any friendship for manipulation or for selfish reason is a turnoff for me.

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  • i don't think this is the case with guys anymore than it is the case with girls too

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  • this isn't an episode of friends

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    • Why can't guys be friends with ex's?

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