Why did he blame me for everything?

My ex dumped me which is okay. But he hurts me more to know he blamed me for everything in our relationship. He didn't admit to do anything wrong. I even admitted that yeah I need to work on controlling my emotions more. While he still blame me for everything. It pisses me off, because he knows how much I loved him. No one is not perfect.

My brother said sometimes people think that they ha vent done anything wrong because what partners (males or females) allow in their relationships. Is this true?

He did mistreat me but I never dumped completely. I always came back.

Did my ex just wanted to find reasons to dump me? thoughts?


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  • I agree with your brother as one possibility - the people he was referring to are "enablers". They enable the person they're with to treat them like crap, or continue bad behaviors without any consequences. Since he did mistreat you but you always came back, you showed him that it was okay to treat you that way because he'd still get what he wanted. And sweetie, that's okay, it just happens and now you've learned that lesson - relationships are give and take from both parties EQUALLY...and that comes from mutual respect, which is the base of any good relationship.

    But I don't think the enabling alone was what made him feel like he wasn't at fault. I think also, people just need to tell themselves that nothing was their fault so that they can avoid feeling guilty. He knows how he treated you. He knows that him dumping you is hurting you. But he's not going to take the blame because he can't handle that too.

    Regardless of the reason for all this though...it doesn't matter anymore. What you need to do is heal, focus on yourself (and gain some self-respect - you need to love YOURSELF more before you move on to anyone else so that you don't fall into this kind of relationship again) and move on. You deserve someone better. Good luck sweetie :).

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  • He hasn't been able to see the mistakes he made because you always came back to him. But in the end, what really matters is not whether he blames you or not... but whether you learned from the mistakes you made and move on from them.

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