How many times is too many times?

I've asked this girl out four times. I didn't even specifically ask as a date. I just asked if she wanted to go wherever with me. Every time she has said something like these:

1. I'm with all of these girls right now, but I wish I could.

2. I'm already at (mall), but I would've liked to.

Every time I say maybe next time or some other time and she says definitely or of course. Tonight she couldn't go out, but she offered to sneak out (she's still in high school, barely.)

It seems like she is trying, but at the same time it's frustrating because it happens every time. And I will say that these are spur of the moment asks, but we've made plans twice: the first one we both had things come up and the second one she didn't want to ditch her friends so she spent the day with them. So I'm just wandering if I should keep asking/trying to plan or find someone else.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I know girls that do that to guys all the time, and in my opinion I would say it's a waste of time at this point. Any person that knows they want to date you doesn't give you the run around unless you guys have had a history or something. Other than that four times is enough and when girls continue to get the same guy asking her out she tends to either make him a joke behind his back or just take advantage of him in general. If you really feel like its worth one more try than go for it, but you can't force anyone to like you and it's not worth your time because you'll only be hurting yourself in the long run.

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What Girls Said 3

  • okay since you think you still have a chance with her with gut feeling that you've always asked her, wrong timing then go ahead, why not ask her one more time? You've done it four times already. If she has an excuse next time then I'm sure that, that should be the last time you should ask her out on a date because she is probably not interested. Some people just aren't blunt about it and try to make excuses to be a little nicer.. but give one more go, I could be wrong.

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    • oh and 'how many times is too many'?

      around 5+ times? it really doesn't matter. You just need to know/identify and understand if the person actually does like you or is interested in dating you or not.

  • hard call...only hope is when she offered to sneak out

    but usually girls/guys will ditch friends to hang with someone they like, so I don't think she's interested

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  • I had the exact same situation recently, where a guy I liked always asked me to catch up or hang out when I was busy.. it was so frustrating! She might really want to catch up with you so if you think she's worth it try planning something in advance once more.. Good luck! :)

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What Guys Said 3

  • it's high time you call the shots. You've asked her out and done your part.

    Now, if she would really be interested, she'll ask you to go out. If she doesn't, she never wanted to go out in the first place.

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  • i would agree with dr stan,you showed your intrest by asking her out few times,so if she is really intrested in you this time she will ask you take her out ,best of luck :)

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  • Four times is two times too many. After the second time you should have stopped but its cool. You did everything you could to start something. Don't ask again. Let her come to you. If she wants to she will make time for you.

    I think she is just being nice and not trying to hurt your feelings.

    Don't mean to be so blunt, I just have been in your spot a few times.

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