What do I do? I feel so guilty about cheating on my boyfriend..

Basically last night I was invited to a graffiti party and went with my girlfriend. I just recently moved to a new place and I don't know many people so I thought it would be a good opportunity to make some acquaintances and meet new people. My boyfriend and I are now in a long distance relationship, but only for this year because I moved due to my parents' jobs and we're going back next year. He and I are in a committed and loving relationship and this is our 6th month.

Last night, the friend I went with to the party kept insisting we drink more and handed me drink after drink then a few shots. We were having a good time, and all. But then this other girl I knew came with her boyfriend and her boyfriend's friends. Everything was okay but I started to lose my soberness and realized I was getting tipsy.I was talking to one of the guys my friend brought with her. This part is a blur but somehow I leaned on his shoulder and we started to cuddle. Then it turned into a peck, then locking lips. He and I were both in a committed relationship and I was extremely tipsy and I said so many times saying I was so scared.

This morning I woke up, with a horrible headache and recalled yesterday's events in the shower. I feel HORRIBLE. The guilt is eating me up and in no way am I saying the drinking is the cause of it, or it was an "accident." Cheating is not an accident and I chose to make a bad decision. I really wouldn't risk anything with my boyfriend for a stranger who I hooked up with because I love him a lot. Yet I know, and he and I have talked about this before, he is very unforgiving and unforgettable when it comes to things like this. He said he didn't like me going out to party but he knew I was honest and would not do anything like this so he grudgingly told me I could go with me promising not to even let another guy touch me. Even though I didn't have sex and stopped at making out with this guy, I feel so horrible because I've never done or thought about doing anything like this. I don't want to tell him and I lied to him about what happened which is a fault topped onto another. It feels like I can't forgive myself.. what should I do..

Even when my friend say "it's okay, you were drunk".. it's NOT okay.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You know, I'm scared of my woman going out drinking all the time... Were in a long distance relationship to and there's been times she has done stuff to, it kills me inside like I bet it kills you and your boyfriend too when stuff like this happens... I'm kind of the same as your friend except you can go out and whatever ha ha but even kissing and cuddling with another guy makes me pissed off! There aren't no excuses for it all, and you need to have more control with drinking, but don't let this tell you and down things... The best thing is to tell him the truth but tell him straight up that you will need his love more than ever now... Forgive yourself darling, because why live with a troubled heart and if the worst case scenario does happen don't let that kill your heart either, but its worse for both of you if you don't tell him anything or if you lie to him about it. You can't change what you've done but you can't let it eat you up, and your "girlfirends" aren't the greatest for doing this to you.


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What Guys Said 2

  • 6 months isn't exactly loving and committed, is it?

    Besides, you kissed a guy. You didn't have sex with him. You're flipping sh*t for doing something stupid in the first place; whenever there's alcohol to be drank, there are stupid things to be done.

    You should probably tell your boyfriend that you cheated on him. It's only fair to him since you're the one who f***ed up. And you're right, it's not okay. Even if you have a long distance thing, you shouldn't disrespect someone like that.

  • How far did you go? Just making out? That's not so bad... but at the same time you promised your boyfriend and he already knew these kinda parties have this kinda sh*t and warned you, but you broke his trust. I'd honestly say you need to either just break up and not tell him a thing. Basically don't inflict more pain on him than he'll get from the break up, or well.. no basically you should do that. I wish I could tell you to just live with the guilt and be the best girlfriend you can be, but you're obviously going to still go to these parties and obviously still act like an idiot. Everyone is an idiot >.> so you might as well save your boyfriend from the pain if it goes even further and ya...

    If you really loved him you wouldn't have done anything even if drunk. Hell, if you really loved him you'd have had the damn strength to not even drink that much. Or, even better, not gone to a stupid party which is so obvious for just getting drunk and f***ing around.

    So ya, if you haven't by now (an update would be nice), break up with him. Or maybe he'll break up with you, but that seems unlikely from his perspective.


What Girls Said 1

  • Well you're right. Its not okay and you have no excuse for your actions. The only choice you have is to live with the guilt, or tell him. Telling him will surely be the end of a relationship, but this may be the best option if you plan to drink again; because clearly, you can not control your drunken desires.


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