Do you think I'm cheating?

Would you consider this cheating?- I met a guy on holiday, spent 2 weeks with him and we really like each other, we decided to try a long-distance relationship. I haven't seen him for 3 or 4 months! But we talk on the phone everyday. I wanted an open-relationship, I thought it would be easier on both of us, he didn't so eventually we agreed to make it closed. I got really drunk a few nights ago and I kissed two guys, or they kissed me. I wasn't very aware of what was going on because I'd had so much to drink that I passed out soon after. I told my sister and she says I'm a cheater, I feel terrible but is it really that bad under the circumstances? I care about my boyfriend a lot, and I've never thought of myself as that sort of person before...


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Most Helpful Girl

  • If you cared about him so much then why did you kiss those guys? It doesn't matter if you were drunk or not if you REALLY cared about him something inside you would have stopped you from doing it.

    And by the way I've been in this exact type of relationship before and trust me, it's not worth it. Without seeing or actually spending time with the person it's really easy to lose control of your true feelings. You may think you really like this guy but you may come to find out you just liked the feeling of having someone there.

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    • i haven't had chance to get to that point where even when I'm completely wasted I don't do it, I've only been with him for 2 weeks properly and it almost feel sometimes like the relationship doesn't really exist he's just a person who I talk to on the phone every night, and someone who I like a lot. if he were in the same country it would be different, I'm 18 and he's 24 he's ready to settle down with someone and I'm not but I know that I will be some point and it could be with him.

    • That's exactly what I meant. I think you need to end things before it get's too far. You could really hurt him and if you wait it will just be worse.

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What Guys Said 2

  • If he kissed a few girls when he was drinking would you be upset? If so, then what you did is cheating.

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    • I completely agree. Also if you're questioning it, then you know it was wrong.

  • Congrats you are a cheater. How does it feel to be a selfish ho? When your boy finds out, he'll be heartbroken. Hope you're happy...

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    • ouch...

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    • i can only assume that you had a very bad experience with someone cheating on you which left you heartbroken, and now the subject hits a nerve spot everytime, without you trying to understand the circumstances, which at least the other answerers did. I admit that what I did was wrong and I figured that out when the person said would it hurt you if your partner did that to you? Then it'scheating. but if your more into sending hate comments without actually xplaining or achieving anything frankly

    • your just trying to make yourself feel better and boost your self esteem, so I suggest raher then answeing the questions and trying to make other people feel as bad as you, maybe you should try asking them.

What Girls Said 1

  • What you did was wrong. Whenever someone pulls out the 'I was drunk' excuse, I always respond with 'If you can't hold your liquor, don't drink.' I think you need to tell him and then you need to make some executive decisions about how you'll avoid this in the future. You say you love him? Do you love him enough to cut down on your drinking? Do you have the self control to do so? If not, go cold turkey. I can have sympathy for a single mistake. A repeat of performances would lose any and all credibility you have.

    The fact he wants a closed relationship means, yes, by his standards, you cheated. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, he's the one you have to answer to.

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