How do you accept and give a cheater another chance?

Hello. I'm just wanting advice from my situation.

I told my boyfriend of 9 months that I needed a couple days to myself. things weren't going good, all we were doing was fighting. I asked for time, not to break up. well in his mind that meant we broke up. it wasn't a couple days later, he's out dating someone else. now we are trying to work things out. I have kids who adore him and I love him also. But I've forgiven him, I just don't know how to make it go easier. I get sad at times, and I can't forget it. I'm trying to do what's best. but knowing that he did that to me tears me up inside.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The first thing you have to understand is that 90-95% of the time when a girl tells a guy that she wants a break it means that there is someone else and she is trying to decide between the two people. The second thing is that guys have very sensitive egos if you make them feel unwanted they will gravitate towards someone who will almost every single time. This is why I always tell any girl I've ever been friends with not to ask for a break unless they mean break-up because given history to most guys it means the same thing, in the future its much better to just "Go stay with family for a few days" or something like that and always tell him that you still want to be with him. However if it only took him a couple of days to be dating someone else seriously then he was probably A) Already started talking to them when you two started having problems, or B) The real issue for him is whatever problems you two were having and the break was just the last straw for him. If you really feel he is worth it for YOU factoring everything else out then try to work it out. But expect him to want an apology for you needing a break to think rather then working out your issues with him. Taking a break or talking to friends about him is a fatal mistake that people make the two people in the relationship need to be able to sit down and talk out their issues like adults if you can't do that then move on.

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What Guys Said 2

  • No offense intended, but I don't think that it is a good idea to forgive or take back someone that has no respect for you. If he cheats, he has no respect for you.

    You see ther end result. You are with regret of forgiving his irrational and erronious behaviour. I hate to say it this way, but the likelyhood of him repeating this behavior is pretty damn high... I have seen it with my own eyes. Hell, worse for wear, I am the product of two cheaters... Even worse than that, I am named after some man that is not even my biological father, rather the man was my mother's ex she cheated on...

    All I can say is this, don't take him back... You will cause yourself more grief and drama than necessary.

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  • In my opinion breaks are stupid and selfish. If you really cared for him then you would not of needed a break. All I can say is that you opened the flood gates and now he is trying the waters. Good Luck!

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