Cheating.Once a cheater always a cheater? Are there times it's OK?

Once a cheater always a cheater is what people believe. When are you classified a cheater? Do different situations dictate or allow for cheating without actually being a cheater? My girlfriends and I feel that anytime you do something with someone else in a committed relationship it is cheating. However, my man and his friends feel that if you are already falling out of love or having problems it's okay to shop around and look for someone new.Can we ever really trust a cheater? Is blind side cheating on your partner the same as I think we are breaking up I need to start looking ahead.

  • I found flirting texts,emails,phone calls,etc.and then started looking around.
    Vote A
  • I still had feelings for an ex and when the opportunity presented itself I couldn't pass it by.
    Vote B
  • Because I thought that the other person was already cheating or flirting and stuff so I figured me too
    Vote C
  • My boy/girl friend and I were having a lot of problems (when I see a break up happening)and I start looking for new people
    Vote D
  • I do not like to be alone and my girl/guy is always busy so I needed something to do
    Vote E
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Most Helpful Guy

  • If you are in a relationship it is NOT okay to "shop around." It is not okay to become emotionally attached with anyone else, Flirt, hang out with excessively, kiss, hug (small hug between friends is OK, if it's a lasting hug it's intimate), or have sex, oral, hold hands, etc with another person.

    Also another peeve of mine is when woman make plans with their "guy friends" but don't invite their man. Sorry, but of course I'm going to start wondering why you're always hanging out with guys and never inviting me.

    On the flip side, if I started hanging out with females and never invited my girl/wife, I expect her to get jealous/insecure, and she has every right to.

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    • And I didn't vote because all your options suck.

    • Thank you for your comment and I personally agree. I The responses are ones that my friends and I have been told. Imagine actually hearing the above responses it feels a lot worse.Personally, D has happened to me.

    • That is horrible and is a form of emotional abuse. If he is at the point where he thinks the relationship is over (which he does if he's shopping around) he needs to communicate with you his issues and you guys try to work them out or he needs to break up with you. If I were you I would not tolerate anything else.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Your man and friends are full of crap.

    If you're falling out of love or having problems, you either fix the challenges you're having or you end the relationship. Cheating on a partner in any situation is cheating, final.

    Often, I think, cheaters look for any excuse to justify their actions. Betrayal of trust in a relationship is still betrayal, no matter the circumstances.

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    • I agree, but really people do feel it's okay to rationalize their behavior and then wonder why we can't forgive or move past. Can you have a realtionship of such a violation like this? I guess that's a different question. I see it as clearindicator of their character and ethics but the guys we know say absolutely false. A guy cheats for some of these reaasons and have no guilt, no remorse and tell us to move forward.

What Girls Said 1

  • There should be a button for "cheating is never okay," because my guess is that the majority of both men and women will feel this way. In my opinion, cheating is never okay regardless of what problems you're having in your relationship. I think that if you don't care enough for someone not to cheat on them, then you shouldn't be with them in the first place. I would break up with them before I'd go looking for and fooling around with other people. To me this is about respect; having at the very least a bare minimum respect for another person so as not to lead them on and make them think you are exclusive when you aren't.

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