Why wont he go away?

Ok. first off, I was with my ex for a little over 4 years. we had our problems but he never wanted to brake up, then he decided to brake it off right before my birthday! its been almost 9 months and he still won't leave me alone even though he broke it off. He still calls my house every 4 days or so.

I stoped wanting to see him because he would make me feel like a convenience, he would play a lot of stupid games with me like calling and then saying he had to go, coming to my house and making stupid coments about other girls, acting like he had better stuff to do. he make me feel like he thinks he could do so much better than me which pissed me off! Everytime I'd get mad at him he would ask me to work things out then a few days later start with his b.s again!

So since then I changed my cell number, I won't go out of my way to see him and yet he continues to call my house from other numbers to get a hold of me or come by unexpectedly.

If the relationship is over than I want him to leave me alone,being friends with him is out of the question, I can't keep going in circles and I think its unhealthy all I want is for him to leave me alone. someone please help!

Ok. I talked to him calmly, without yelling. I think I made my point. If he doesn't get it after that then this is one stupid guy! I hope it worked.


Most Helpful Girl

  • He sounds unbalanced, and you should be careful. Did you tell him that you wanted him to leave you alone? You need to tell him and make sure he knows you mean it. If you have to let your phone ring and let the answering machine pick up for a while do that- keep yourself busy so that you're not at home if he tries to stop by. Seriously though, if it's getting to the point that you feel like he's harrassing you, you need to let him know that you'll take action if it doesn't stop. Tell him calmly, and point out to him what he's doing.

    No offense, but he sounds terrible! You're better off making sure he knows you want this to stop, if it doesn't, you might have no choice but to actually take action.


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What Girls Said 4

  • do you think he still loves you? maybe that's his way (I know it sounds wierd) of showing you he's hurt. Overall, when he does come by, have a serious talk with him about what you want done and what needs to stop. are you guys still sleeping with eachother? if you are, then that's the reason why.

    • I don't think anyone who treats you like that loves you... I lost 10 lbs during the realtionship He was always trying to cath me in "lies" he told me I looked too young and let myslf goit is also very noticable when I'm under 5 feet. no I'm not sleeping with him nor do I want to be, after he started talking to me like that I don't kiss him or anything!

    • If you don't like the way he's treating you and you don't like him anymore, then just tell him straight up

  • I think he still wants you back but he cannot accept it to himself because of his ego. What he is trying to do is hurt you to make you feel that he is a big lost on your part. What you are doing is good. Just ignore him because you are over him. Since he is still bothering you, just talk to him and ask him what does he gets in return in doing so. What else does he wants from you. After hearing his side or explanation, tell him to act his age and be a man.

  • tell him. don't act like everything is fine when he comes over. get him the message. make sure he knows that you and him can't be friends. you need to make sure that you aren't leading him on, and if your sure your not, then just tell him that if he doesn't leave you alone you may have to take legal actions. you want to be left alone to move on and find someone else to be happy with :) good luck.

  • Wow. I'm going through the exact same thing. I actually just posted a question asking like the exact same thing!

    My ex is a super jerk like this too! He only wants me to see him when HE has time, it's a little confusing and then acts like he is the greatest thing on the planet and that onle he can do better than me. Which. sorry but I don't think that's true at all! My friends think I'm insane for even letting this guy get to me like he does. I just want him to leave me alone! So I can move on because you're right when you say, it doesn't seem healthy.

    I think these kind of guys are just plain manipulative. Anyway. I hope everything works out for you.

    • I wish you the best of luck just stay away as much as possible! I don't get what they get out of treating you like that... and as far as friends they can't say anything If they have never been in your situation... I even tried asking guys what I can do and no one can give me an asnwer!