He told me a week ago that he is now seeing another woman and it has destroyed me. I can’t eat, sleep or even breathe. I have been prescribed antidepressants but nothing is helping with the pain.
I stupidly and embarrassing begged him back but has said no, although he has admitted he still loves and misses me and looks at my pictures, the pain I have caused him is too great and he is terrified to go through that again.
What I am basically asking is, is there a chance? Will this new woman turn into anything serious? The thought of them being together and him forgetting about me kills me! Although we have kids I have told him, I can’t see or speak to him for the time being as its too painful so we are going through mutual friends at the moment but its killing me not hearing from him and i’m sat here thinking does he even think of me anymore? Did 11 years and 2 kids not mean anything or not enough that he can jump unto bed with someone else so quickly?
I am mess and I need help!
Most Helpful Guys
I don't understand. First you wanted to end the relationship AND call off your wedding. Then after a few months you're emotionally dying because you want him back?
I disagree with most of the hateful comments many have given you.
1. No one goes into ANY relationship with the intent of being miserable. Whatever the arguments were about, they're done and no longer there. Enjoy the peace you now have.
2. You made the decision to end things because you saw zero future in what was happening. Time to live with your decisions.
3. Believe it or not, you had a part in the relationship that drove it to its end. Figure out what part YOU played and remember to NOT be like that in the future.
4. I kinda know what you're going through. My ex ended our nearly 15 year marriage with a letter to me in my suitcase when I left for a business trip. I had zero warning from her about this.
5. Being upset is normal and emotionally distraught - acceptable, considering you basically went through a divorce without the legal proceedings. However, time is taking you forward but you're looking backwards. At some point (VERY SOON) you need to quit looking back at what you had, and look forward to what will be.
6. You cannot control your ex, what he does, with whom, and when. All you can do is expect he'll be a good father to your two kids. What you CAN do is be the best mom you can for them. They need you. Your job is to focus on them AND take care of yourself - because no one else will.
Finally, I wish you the best. I really do. Life absolutely can have some VERY hateful moments. Come out of them knowing you WILL survive and go on.
I see..."i broke up with..."
I see..."..5 months"...
I see..." after 11 years"..
I see..".. calling off our wedding"...
I see.."i am a mess.." i totally agree...
Thing is, i think you were a mess from the start. Hell, im surprised he didn't start dating this woman almost immediately. How do you dump someone, pretty much destroying everything, then feel bad about the outcome?
You brought this one on yourself boo boo. The way i see it... you had it all, but you just.. had.. to... do.. that... stupid... female... shit. Always gotta go Oliver Twist on a guy. a guy gives 1, you want 2, he gives 5 now you want 8.
You had it all... Time, an impending marriage, kids... but you probably wanted more... he couldn't deliver because he thought he had done enough. but you still fucking wanted more and arguments ensued. You know... im putting myself in his situation... this guy is way too nice. You would not believe what i would have done out of spite.
You are gonna have to do what every guy does when the situation is reversed... you are gonna have to grovel. Thats pretty much it.
Honestly, i dont think he has moved on, i think he is giving what you THREW AWAY, to someone he thinks will APPRECIATE it better.
here's the part i call the most fucked up... you called off the marriage... wow. you women smh... do you even know the amount of fear a man has when he proposes.. and being engaged... knowing what is coming up and what he is giving up.. and after all that effort, you just call it off, in a snap, like its nothing... over what seems like greed. I would have married one of the bridesmaids... right there and then. the wedding would have gone on lol... thats just me.
Grovel... thats what you are gonna have to do... oh... and I don't know why... but i think my first 5 lines already had the topics. lol... what an unplanned coincidence. so let me end with what you should do for each topic...
---appeal, review, reminisce