My boyfriend broke up with me to work on himself, should I wait on him?

My boyfriend broke up with me to work on himself. He said that he isn't the person he should be and as a result, he isn't being a good boyfriend. He is graduating and moving about 4 hours away from here. He told me that he wants to be with me, but just not right now. He feels like with the way our relationship is right now, distance would ruin it. He said that he definitely wants a future with me, but he doesn't want to ruin that chance now. He also told me he didn't want to cut me out of his life, but he hasn't talked to me or anything and won't answer my messages (I literally told him congrats on graduating and he left me on read). He offered to take care of my cat over Christmas break so I'll have to see him in a month. He also said he doesn't want to date other people and that he wants to talk eventually but he feels like if we talk I'll think that we are going to get back together soon. I don't know what to do, I love him but he's being distant and cold and I don't know how to react. I want to believe him but I'm also scared of getting hurt. I do want to spend the rest of my life with him, but the way he is acting now makes me want to resent him.
Updates:
Update you guys: he called me today and basically told me that he doesn't care about anyone right now and that he doesn't want any kind of relationship that takes maintenance. He says that he doesn't owe me anything and that he wasn't asking me to wait but just saying that he wants a future with me. He told me that he doesn't care what I do or if I move on. He was yelling the whole time and being really mean. I'm literally so hurt.

0|0
46

Most Helpful Guy

  • He wants a future with you, but he doesn't want to ruin that chance?
    that's the dumbest excuse I've ever heard in my life.
    it's a BORING show, I've seen it before and I wouldn't recommend you watching it. girl, when a guy says and promises you with marriage, future, and kids, pack your bags to leave because he's lying.

    0|0
    0|0
    • You don't deserve it, but it happened. No matter how painful, at least you've got the answer that won't make you hanging between earth and sky anymore. It's your time to reevaluate everything you thought you knew. Take your time and space.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Wait maybe three months for him, any longer just forget it. Sure, it’ll suck moving on, but you deserve to be happy too. And waiting hurts. I hope things go well for the both of you

    0|0
    0|1

Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 5

  • To me (in my opinion mind you) this just sounds like he is breaking up with you and just wants to avoid the drama that would become of it. I understand what it is like to love someone and the desire to spend the rest of your life with them. I have heard the promises of being together one day, and that your the one they want, and in the end the exact thing that is happening to you now happened to me. Limited contact if any at all, excuses, hallow promises, until one day they were just gone, no contact, nothing.

    Is it possible that he is being genuine? Well yes it is, is it likely that this is the case? I truly don't believe so. But at the very end, its your decision what you do. You can wait and see what happens, but this comes with a lot of loneliness and doubts. That or you can choose to move on and if somewhere down the road when he has fixed what he says is broken, you two find each other, than you can try again.

    I chose the first one which is probably obvious and even now I am stuck between having moved on and still holding onto a useless hope that the person I love will suddenly come back.

    0|0
    0|0
    • I am so sorry it came to that. No one deserves to be yelled at, no matter how messed up the person claims to be. The hurt passes with time as all things do, I wish you to find the person who treats you the way you deserve.

  • It is possible that he is being straightforward and sincere and means every word that he says to you, but it is more likely that he is trying to break up and minimize the trauma by saying he needs to take time out. This is a an ploy that has been used many times and you should be suspicious of what he says unless you feel that there are excellent reasons to trust him.

    0|0
    0|0
    • He is being probably being angry because he wanted an easy way out of the relationship and you are not making it easy. That is not your fault. He is just not being honest with you. Even when you learn that a special someone has lied to you or been unkind, it still hurts.

  • No you should date others. Never wait for someone unless they are also waiting for you. He mad no promises and neither should you.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Thanks for the update. You dodged a bullet here. The next one will be better.

  • No. Move on.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 3

  • Do not wait for him, my ex said something similar and now has a new girlfriend...

    0|0
    0|0
  • Don’t wait for him ! Work on yourself as well and if you guys get back together in the future so be it but never wait around for someone!

    1|0
    0|0
  • You should believe him. Just be patient.

    0|1
    0|0

Recommended myTakes

Loading...