How do you break up with a REALLY insecure guy?

We're not married but we have a 3 year old and we live together by the way, so I'm still trying to figure out how I could even swing the finances. But aside from that, I've tried to break up with him 5 times in the last 2 years and yet here we are, living together still. Been together 5 years. Haven't kissed or had sex in a year because I don't even feel connected to him anymore. We don't hold hands, share laughs, none of that anymore, for the last 3 or 4 years. And the last 2 have been really bad. I don't know how to get it through his head. Last couple times it didn't go well at all. I have a safety plan but no family and I can't drive. I don't know it's like his ears shut down when I start talking about our relationship. We've already been to couples therapy and he quit after 2 months or so and it didn't even help.
How do you break up with a REALLY insecure guy?
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