Should I go back with my abusive ex?

My ex boyfriend is abuser. He also cheated on me, and threatened to expose my nudes (to make things worse, he is a cop!) ... And, of course I deleted all my contacts with him, and for 4-5 months it was all okay, I stopped having feelings for him, even though he continued to message me few times a month (and he still does) . And every time, we end up having an argument, about why we broke up, why don't I want to be with him again... He always says that he changed, that even though he did have side chicks he always loved me and he always ended up coming back to me, because I'm the only one who understood him etc. I am 99% sure that it is not true, but lately I kind of started missing him and thinking about him. Apart from things he has done, he always was really peotective and nice to me, and never hurt me beside things I already mentioned. I know, I don't have self respect, I am stupid for missing an abuser, but it's really not my choice, I just can't go on without him. I'm really afraid that the next time, I'll be able to forgive him. Should I do it? Do you believe he deserves another chance?
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Should I go back with my abusive ex?
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