Do you keep a list of people who wronged you?

Question

I do. It's divided in two categories - people I actually know in real life, and that's 68 names, and people online or celebrities/politicians, and that's 216 names.
On the 68 people I know in real life - most of them family, acquaintances, friends and rivals - I write down possible ways to get back at them based on the severity of their wrongdoings and keep it overall realistic, since it's concrete planning for future actions.
For the celebrities/online people, I allow myself to fantasize a bit, but that's it.
What about you?

Updates:

15 d

For people who keep mentioning violence - I abhor violence and will never resort to it.
There are far more ways to get back at someone without physically harming them.

Answer 1

Youryeodongsaeng

Xper 6

Oh, yes. My grudges ages as I do. I've been holding grudges for so many years, up to my childhood. This is why I'm depressed, I'm so focusing on the past events that has already happen 2-3 years ago and my grudges can longer than that. My MDD was from holding those grudges that happened in the past and I would love it if I was free from my MDD and grudges, because it can be very tiring.

One of my ways of how I'd try to handle my grudges is killing, but I wish there were an alternative way of killing, like an author killing off a character.
There may be a theory that I'm gonna create: Am I really living this life? What if I am just imagining all of this? My real dad actually died a long time ago and when he went up here, to collect me for the first time in my 12 years of life, he was actually taking me with him, seeing that my mom and her husband will do something to make me wanna be in foster home in the future from then. When I said that I wanted to go back home, something probably casted an illusion of what would've really happened to me if I lived to be 16 years old. Maybe. Just maybe, the one who casted this illusion is trying to push my buttons and make me end this so-called 'life'.

letsgettalking

18 d
Can I ask what is MDD?
Youryeodongsaeng

18 d
Major depression disorder.

Answer 2

letsgettalking

Can I ask what is MDD?

Answer 3

Youryeodongsaeng

Major depression disorder.

Answer 4

Screenwriter

Yoda

Making the list takes enough time. And why hold all that shit in and stew in it?
Sometimes the people who "wronged" you don't even know they've offended or hurt you. So why list them?
Then there are others who are in the past, so they're off the radar. Why bother.
Who made you judge and jury? Is that realistic in any sense of the word?
Why not let these resentments GO and move on. Forgive the people who are ignorant or unaware of how they affect others.
This is a waste of time. There are so many positive ways to live. This is not one of them.

Answer 5

TruthBringer

Xper 6

No. I don't give much importance to people who I dislike or who dislike me. I live my life for myself, not for resenting people or allow myself to be annoyed. This includes the people who have wronged me. I've dealt with things such as betrayal, disrespect and racism. It used to bother me before, but now, I just brush it off whenever I see it happening again. Having an abundance mindset and truly not care of unconstructive criticism is one of the most important things you have to do as a person.

You keeping that list is nothing but a reminder of negativity and a waste of energy. Which has an impact on your overall happiness. Let it go. Be in the present and look forward to a better future, without them. That doesn't mean what they have done to you is right, but it's not right to allow them to have that much important to your life.

Answer 6

Not_Average

Xper 6

Nope, that's too intense. I put a mental note in my head, and move on. I don't put energy into negative people.

Answer 7

Account | 232 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

Not a list, but I used to have a place in my head where they all resided.
Growing up, I can't do that anymore.
I used to be really petty in the past and I kept quite a lot of anger inside me and unleashed it towards them whenever the opportunity presented itself to me.
I no longer can do that, I don't have the energy and it is seriously not worth it.
No one is worth it to take a spot in your head.
All of that is wasted energy.

TruthBringer

18 d
That's a great decision you have made. I'm glad you've grown as a better person! You're right, it's nothing but a waste of energy. And those people aren't worth it
Account

18 d
Thank you, I really appreciate that

Answer 8

TruthBringer

That's a great decision you have made. I'm glad you've grown as a better person! You're right, it's nothing but a waste of energy. And those people aren't worth it

Answer 9

Account

Thank you, I really appreciate that

Answer 10

AlienParasite

Yoda

Nope. I want to make a list about people, but about details. What are their ticks, what's their personality type according to different schemes, what seem to be their fears, goals, likes, dislikes, best skills, drawbacks, most used expressions, funny or interesting anecdotes... But I'm a procrastinator.

Returning to the main issue, I don't see interest in any other type of list. I don't see how revenge could improve my life or make me feel a worthy lasting satisfaction.

Answer 11

Anonymous

Who has time for this? If you have "that many" people who have wronged you, maybe it's not them, but you, and as an adult rather than keep endless lists, try actually dealing with the situations and not harboring feelings of resentment or hatred for the rest of your life about it because they are out their living their lives not worried about you, while you're making useless lists about them. You're verging on crazy territory here writing down what you'd do to them...seriously....you may need to deal with your issues in a more constructive manner or potentially seek counseling.

Jean-Marie_Céline

19 d
I'd agree with you on the useless part up to a point, since I can't get back to online people and celebrities.
But for IRL people, it's not useless, I have already took some payback on three of those people. I keep it realistic, I only write down things I'll really do to them.
Opinion Owner

18 d
That's disturbing.

Answer 12

Jean-Marie_Céline

I'd agree with you on the useless part up to a point, since I can't get back to online people and celebrities.
But for IRL people, it's not useless, I have already took some payback on three of those people. I keep it realistic, I only write down things I'll really do to them.

Answer 13

Opinion Owner

That's disturbing.

Answer 14

Daniela1982 | 79 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Guru

Nah, I let Karma deal with them.

Answer 15

aialex | 56 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Yoda

Yes. I wouldn't go as far as planning revenge against them, but if they're on fire, and I have water, I'll drink it.

Answer 16

Agape93 | 228 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

No need to have a list, I know exactly who they are, what they did, why they did it and more often than not, where they live or work.

Answer 17

Everglow5

Xper 5

No. I just make a mental note to destroy that person in my free time. Unless they apologize or it was a genuine accident.

Answer 18

Hangry22 | 57 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Guru

I have it in my mind. I may not remember the reason or incident but i will always remember the feeling and once an oppurtunity comes, i will take it

Answer 19

prettyfacegoodtaste

Xper 2

Yes and no. I remember their names and faces and vow to never bless them with my presence again.

Answer 20

burlen | 126 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Yoda

Really? 😲 That’s scarily weird if you really do such a thing.

Answer 21

purplepoppy

Master

The police call that evidence. I just keep the names in my head.

Answer 22

Levin | 62 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Guru

I have a list, yes.

I should imagine I will be like Stalin one day. Just biding my time...

Answer 23

M1k3y

Xper 4

If you write it down they're affecting your life more than they deserve to.. don't waste your time of them. It'll only bring you down. Move on and enjoy your life rather than devoting time to those who don't care.

Answer 24

Gwenhwyfar | 92 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Guru

No. I don’t do that. There are very few people I hate enough to wish harm upon.

Answer 25

KingdomForAKiss

Xper 7

No, I don't write down things like that. I know who has and I keep them far out of my life.

Answer 26

taeh_ie2

Xper 5

I don’t.

I just go by the quote forgive and forget.

Answer 27

TacosRAwesome | 514 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

I have a few people I wish serious pain to, but I can't be bothered to get revenge so I hope life fucks them over.

Answer 28

Hmmmbetternothere

Xper 5

Not at all, just keep on moving on down the road of life. Love to prove people like that wrong instead. Do I wish them well, yes.

Answer 29

Eleni079

Xper 5

Not a physical list a mental list. Though if they send mean and nasty threatening text I’ll scream shot , and printed out.

Answer 30

Liam_Hayden

Guru

No. Unless the person is actively antagonistic, I try to avoid wasting time and energy on such nonsense.

Answer 31

JakeS00

Xper 5

Nope. I forgive no matter how hard it was to not, and move on with my life. Not worth fretting over something that will be ancient sooner than later.

Answer 32

pleasestopthis | 216 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Guru

I don't keep a list but I remember. Most were other kids from my childhood years, though.

Answer 33

kuttypuli

Xper 1

I keep a list but not for revenge. I stay away from those people as I will never trust them again. If I get a chance to return the favour, I'm just a man, I would gladly be opportunistic.

Answer 34

Clyde_123

Yoda

I don't have a list but I don't forget who they are

Answer 35

Maxilicious

Xper 1

Not worth the time or energy. Things matter when you decide they do.

Answer 36

OceanMelon

Xper 7

Yeah, not an actually list but I remember everyone who wronged me.

Answer 37

tartaarsaus

Master

I can’t really recall the last time anyone wronged me or was even mean against me. I don’t see why I should keep such a list, seems paranoid and toxic.

tartaarsaus

18 d
I mean, I generally try to be kind to basically everybody so it rarely happens that someone I reasonably frequently interact with is remotely rude to me.

Answer 38

tartaarsaus

I mean, I generally try to be kind to basically everybody so it rarely happens that someone I reasonably frequently interact with is remotely rude to me.

Answer 39

PrincessSaf

Xper 1

No its a waste of time and actually only puts you down

Answer 40

curious_observer

Xper 1

No I like to wake up early day surprised as to who is going to piss me the hell off. Lol no need to carry the shit from the previous day.

Answer 41

Roman1111

Xper 3

I move on quickly after being wronged. I don't hold grudges or have list of people or anything like that.

Answer 42

Redstang88 | 69 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

Uh, no
This is a about the most toxic, vindictive thing I’ve ever heard. You do realize this behaviour isn’t normal, right?

Jean-Marie_Céline

19 d
Actually it's better to write down, so I don't forget.
In the past I would forget about stuff and forgive, instead if I keep a written record I can remind myself every day what those people did to me.
Redstang88

19 d
That’s exactly what I mean
Jean-Marie_Céline

19 d
Other people do a mistake in moving on and forgiving. Why give chances to who's not trustworthy?
I realize that if I want to keep a steady control on my family and social circle and be the effective leader, I also have to make examples and keep everyone else on a tight leash.
My father is like that and everything went well for him, so I intend to be just like him.
Show All Show Less
Redstang88

19 d
So don’t keep people around that you don’t trust. Sure we’re all stuck with coworkers we don’t like, but just keep that business
Who elected you leader? You’re the biggest train wreck of the lot. From what you post on here most of your perceived slights are people trying to save you from yourself
Jean-Marie_Céline

19 d
I can count the number of people I trust on one hand, and even then I still change them on the regular so I don't risk them betraying me.
I'm not a trainwreck, I've managed to start up an enterprise in barely two months and I'm going start another activity. I can build things, make connections and put a good public face. This makes me more than fit to be a leader, whereas my mother, my sisters or my fiancée aren't capable of doing a thing.
Redstang88

18 d
Me too, that’s all you need

That really isn’t relevant to mental stability, you are headed for a meltdown of epic proportions. You insult your own fiancé and clearly do not trust her, why the fuck are marrying her? Or better question, why is she marrying you?
Redstang88

18 d
I just cannot understand how a person could be so hateful
Jean-Marie_Céline

18 d
It's not an insult, it's a statement.
And one thing is being engaged, another is actually getting married.
And I'm not hateful, just very cautious - and frankly, after years of getting screwed by others, it's time to start screwing back.

Answer 43

Jean-Marie_Céline

Actually it's better to write down, so I don't forget.
In the past I would forget about stuff and forgive, instead if I keep a written record I can remind myself every day what those people did to me.

Answer 44

Redstang88

That’s exactly what I mean

Answer 45

Jean-Marie_Céline

Other people do a mistake in moving on and forgiving. Why give chances to who's not trustworthy?
I realize that if I want to keep a steady control on my family and social circle and be the effective leader, I also have to make examples and keep everyone else on a tight leash.
My father is like that and everything went well for him, so I intend to be just like him.

Answer 46

Redstang88

So don’t keep people around that you don’t trust. Sure we’re all stuck with coworkers we don’t like, but just keep that business
Who elected you leader? You’re the biggest train wreck of the lot. From what you post on here most of your perceived slights are people trying to save you from yourself

Answer 47

Jean-Marie_Céline

I can count the number of people I trust on one hand, and even then I still change them on the regular so I don't risk them betraying me.
I'm not a trainwreck, I've managed to start up an enterprise in barely two months and I'm going start another activity. I can build things, make connections and put a good public face. This makes me more than fit to be a leader, whereas my mother, my sisters or my fiancée aren't capable of doing a thing.

Answer 48

Redstang88

Me too, that’s all you need

That really isn’t relevant to mental stability, you are headed for a meltdown of epic proportions. You insult your own fiancé and clearly do not trust her, why the fuck are marrying her? Or better question, why is she marrying you?

Answer 49

Redstang88

I just cannot understand how a person could be so hateful

Answer 50

Jean-Marie_Céline

It's not an insult, it's a statement.
And one thing is being engaged, another is actually getting married.
And I'm not hateful, just very cautious - and frankly, after years of getting screwed by others, it's time to start screwing back.

Answer 51

Anonymous

Why not write down what makes you suffer like that, to the point of hating other people?
It seems to me you are on a downward spiral.

Answer 52

catsandbroadway

Xper 4

No, I leave it behind me but I Will remember it and maybe remind them of that time if they ever wronged me again

Answer 53

Missycloak

Xper 4

No only crazy people do that. There was a guy like that in Nova Scotia. He ended up killing those people and himself. He was a denturist, if you want to look it up.

Answer 54

sheikalana | 50 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Yoda

Absolutely not. Have better things to do in life.

Answer 55

Bee-Hatch

Xper 7

No that's really bitter. Why would anyone do that?

Answer 56

dwiller943 | 62 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Yoda

Literally a long list in my head.

Answer 57

Sweetheart666

Xper 4

I don’t forget them. I’m pretty easy going, too.

Answer 58

myhaiva

Xper 5

I don't keep grudges.

Answer 59

AnthonyJ01

Xper 3

I also tell what they did.

AnthonyJ01

15 d
It is like my ex. I do tell what her, her children, and her mother did. At times I give details. I have also let others listen to recorded calls of her threats.
Might not mean much, but it just shows that she is not the goodie goodie she makes herself to be.

Answer 60

AnthonyJ01

It is like my ex. I do tell what her, her children, and her mother did. At times I give details. I have also let others listen to recorded calls of her threats.
Might not mean much, but it just shows that she is not the goodie goodie she makes herself to be.

Answer 61

jimmy2 | 156 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Guru

No that will get you in trouble

Answer 62

msc545 | 102 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Yoda

I do, but it's in my head. I wish it wasn't.

Answer 63

psychoticanimallover

Xper 5

Oh Jean.

Answer 64

hopegirly

Xper 5

Aw no haha I don’t

Answer 65

nodnol32

Guru

Nope. I remember.

Answer 66

Anonymous

I feel bad for you. You used to be kinda nice.

Jean-Marie_Céline

19 d
Wrong.
Agape93

18 d
It’s less a matter of niceness, and more about being honest about ones nature.
Opinion Owner

18 d
@Agape93 so before he was hiding how petty, paranoid and hateful he actually is
Show All Show Less
Agape93

18 d
Possibly, but I can’t say for sure, only he can.
Opinion Owner

18 d
@Agape93 that's sad
Jean-Marie_Céline

18 d
I'm not hateful, I'm just being cautious.
Who hurt me, will probably do it again. It's a world of sharks out there, so why shouldn't I be on the offensive?
And like Maximilien Robespierre said, ''Softness to traitors will suffocate the innocent''.
Opinion Owner

15 d
Update: I really think you just bark and no bite.. don't believe you are like that

Answer 67

Jean-Marie_Céline

Wrong.

Answer 68

Agape93

It’s less a matter of niceness, and more about being honest about ones nature.

Answer 69

Opinion Owner

@Agape93 so before he was hiding how petty, paranoid and hateful he actually is

Answer 70

Agape93

Possibly, but I can’t say for sure, only he can.

Answer 71

Opinion Owner

@Agape93 that's sad

Answer 72

Jean-Marie_Céline

I'm not hateful, I'm just being cautious.
Who hurt me, will probably do it again. It's a world of sharks out there, so why shouldn't I be on the offensive?
And like Maximilien Robespierre said, ''Softness to traitors will suffocate the innocent''.

Answer 73

Opinion Owner

Update: I really think you just bark and no bite.. don't believe you are like that

Answer 74

Anonymous

No. I would be wasting my valuable time.

Answer 75

FriendlyEnigma

Xper 7

Hmm a mental one yes

Answer 76

In_Trance | 587 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

Lol, no

Answer 77

Anonymous

You sound mad

Do you keep a list of people who wronged you?

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