How to deal with two failures at the same time?

I dated this girl for 4 years. Her family and mine are very close. She was my first girlfriend and I really loved her. When she broke up woth me she said that I was just too awkward and that things change. Regardless, I walked away and respected her decision.

At the same time, I was given a project at uni that was hard. I was depressed and wasn't doing that good of a job. The doctor who was tutoring me eventually told me that I wouldn't be able to do it. I am not proud of this and feel anxious about this.

By a total coincidence, my ex and this doctor met and are now together. I see them at family gatherings and it kills me. I guess it's like two of my insecurities mashed up together and have a hard time dealing with it. I get so anxious at times, that I end up throwing up.

Although I am sure that they have better things to do, I cannot stoo imagining that she told him that I was awkward and he told her I was useless and incompetent.

I have no idea how to deal with and I need advice
How to deal with two failures at the same time?
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