Staying friends with your exes is fine and healthy. Agree or disagree?

[jamesgoldman]

I agree because I am with mine but we were friends before we dated
I will say a couple of points that might have helped
one of them lives abroad and the other lives on the other side of the country (we amicably broke up when they moved) and that probably helps but if they hadn't moved who knows I could be married by now

They have roles in my life that no one else has such as my first girlfriend is teaching me Polish and the other supports me to keep me away from nail polish as I had issue there all those years ago

[FlutteringFeelings]

Staying friends with an ex is just saying that the two cannot accept that they’re not meant to be together. They both share either an emotional or sexual connection that is too hard to disconnect from so they stick around because it feels familiar. The main person who ends up heart broken in situations like this is the woman most of the time.


The guy will be open to the idea and try to have his cake and eat it too. He’ll be with his ex but he’ll have other women that he’s juggling because he’s “single”. It always turns out being a messy situation and ends roughly because two people refuse to bury what is dead.

[sheikalana]

I'm only friends with one ex. We don't talk or see each other often tho and it took us at least one year to start talking with each other again and build a friendship. I think it's only okay when you both don't see each other as potencial partners and don't have second intentions with each other anymore. If you still have all those feelings then it's best if you stay away from each other for some time.

[ChrisMaster69]

none of them, it’s not fine and healthy with all ex’s nor is it bad with all of them.

im close friends with some but restraining order with one.
im good friends with my ex wife, which for me is good.

but including the restraining order one there are some I avoid like the plague.

[Jean-Marie_Céline]

Agree, it's much better to part ways in positive terms and if possible staying friends - with some limits of course.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

I think that depends on too many variables to be a yes/no answer that fits every situation...

[NathanDavis]

I do not entirely agree, while I ended in good terms with all my exes, and I can still communicate with them... the level and degrees of closeness are all different from one another, so the "should be friends with all your exes" should not be a goal as an statement, it should just be nice and a good thing that it can happen... it if cannot happen, then don't force anything.

[Miristheiss]

I don't know.
I never want to see them anymore when we breakup. I go no contact.
I never would have stayed with a woman who had an ex who was really close in her life and saw her all the time and did things with her still.
That doesn't interest me so I'd have stayed clear of her once I realized her ex came with the package of dating her.

[loves2learn]

Depends. I never really had a very serious relationship before my husband so I am still friends with a lot of my “exes” from high school. I don’t think that really counts tho.

[Smashingdoozy]

Agree when the situation suits.
Wouldn't ever be friends with the ex who attempted to rape me but I'm best friends with the ex that I mutually agreed to break up with.

[AdithyaR]

Purely depends on the relationship.
A mutual breakup due to incompatibility, you can potentially maintain a healthy relationship. Sometimes you're better off as friends than partners.

But in many other cases, it's not healthy cause it could prevent you from moving on. Or if they cheated or were abusive.

[whatdoyouwantt]

in my opinion you can only be friends with an ex if you never felt anything. If you have felt smtn, then you wouldn’t be able to accept them doing things they used to do with the new person. A breakup already hurts you but how can you bear watching them move on? Its just not possible

[CrypticViper]

It depends on the ex, mine refuses to talk to me, even though we have kids together. She's still upset I have full custody and won't listen to reason. I'm not going to force her to be friends I just ask her to treat her daughters with respect and leave it at that.

[reallyhonestguy]

It depends a lot!
It depends on how my girlfriend feel about their exes and if is there any remote chance she has residual feelings or if she admits they are hotter than me. That can create dangerous opportunities.

I think to work, both people need a break from each other at least months.

[lovedejj_xo]

I don’t like it my boyfriend is friends with all of his exes which is annoying and I chalked it to his attachment issues. When we first started dating we broke up a month in (over something stupid) and I actually deleted him off everything. Well I guess he was shocked since he texted me and I told him I’m not into being friends with exes I move on by deleting. So he wasn’t use to that clearly

[iseekpinetrees]

I think its healthy if y'all both moved on. If one is still into the other a lot obviously no its bad. But u can still think an ex is good looking but know hey things didn't work out between us but we're still cool is fine too.

[NotTacocaT6969]

It’s not always a yes or no.


Sometimes the ex is purely toxic and friendship is impossible.


Other times it turns out the two just don’t work as a couple but have no negative feelings about it.

[PaynefulPleasures]

Look I tried this once years ago what a fluckin mistake every time they'd get in a fight my phone would light up , he'd be like tell her I'm not like that, or why did she say or do that, etc. The past is the past leave it there, lesson learned ✌️

[Browneye57]

It's fine, but really, what's the point? Or are you just hoping one day they'll change their mind and want to have sex with you again?

[have_a_good_day]

Strongly disagree. My lovers will never be my friends and my friends will never be my lovers.
You draw that line and you keep them on opposite sides.

[yeahitsmegrace]

I think it depends actually. If it is a peaceful break-up, I think it would be fine to stay friends. If the break-up was forceful, hateful, and because of fights, I probably wouldn't stay friends.

[Mamaganja]

Not for me. Typically em they’re exes because they betrayed me. Can’t have people I don’t trust to be my friends.

[Drumlin2001]

Depends on circumstances. I have 2 kids with my girlfriend. If we split I'd hope we could stay friendly for their sake.

[Anonymous]

No. It's called ex for a reason. If people clung to former jobs as example they'd get nowhere. And the same applies. Because everyone after is going to look at the "friend" as friends with benefits, etc and not really be interested in you