My ex wants me back after he cheated on me while I was on a student exchange. What now?

Hey, hope you can help me with this one:

Me and my ex were together a good year. It was going very nice, we had something special, moved in together..

10 months together I got accepted for a 3 month exchange study program which I couldn't reject. He supported me to go, I went, we promised each other we'd stay committed.

had web cam chats, fb chats.. It was going well for a while, but 1 and a half month in he became distant. It worried me and when I 'd ask him what was going on he'd say he loved me but was busy and that I was being paranoid.

my gut feeling was telling me something was going on and being so far away there was no way of finding out. Anyways, all this little 'rejections' in form of not contacting me when I didn't contact him not to be pushy and so on led me into an emotional state where I decided he didn't care for me and had a fling with a nice guy I'd met on a festival. (didn't have sex) Doing that I got back some power to my bruised ego and decided that I can't accept being treated like I was by my boyfriend and told him I thought he didn't care about me and that I was leaving him. He - woke from his no contact dream, pissed off at my decision saying id been childish, and then almost begging me to wait until I came home to talk it over.

So I waited another 1.5 months, without fooling around with anyone, being faithful and missing him like hell (but remaining in this weird wrong feeling)

I came back and things weren't anything close to what I had expected them to be. 2 weeks of being home, intuition, some snooping and a massive confrontation and I found out he'd been cheating on me with another girl, doing drugs and having sex in our place about the time when his attention towards me flattened. Id found loads of texts he'd been sending to other girls as well but I still don't know if it was more than that. He says they were just friends as he was so lonely when I was away. He even went out without me and got caught up with another girl and had sex with her while I was back only 10 days! He lied and cried into my eyes and I had to interrogate him and snoop him to find out the truth. He kept saying how much he loved me and that what he did was a mistake.

I left him saying I couldn't forgive him. I was heartbroken. Moved back to my parents after 5 years living on my own cause couldn't bare to be in the same room as he was.

We are now almost 2 months apart. He keeps sending me occasional texts how much he misses me and loves me and how much it was a mistake, that he was lonely, sometimes he'd say its also my fault cause id left him alone for 3 months..I remained strong and I never sent him any sign of how much I really missed him.

After a month of NC we met for a coffee cause he wanted a chance to explain. He used it to try to get me back but I rejected him. We met again after a week..I enjoyed seeing him he told me he loved me, I still love him but I didn't tell him that. I went NC after cause I don't know what to do. Any clues?

My ex wants me back after he cheated on me while I was on a student exchange. What now?
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