Don't want a guy to get between friendship, advice?

So my friend dating this guy, lets call him Steve off and on for almost 3 years. They had a bad breakup, but she's moved on and is happy with her new boyfriend and they are engaged to be married. Now I've had a bad few months, and Steve invited me over to watch a movie, just to cheer me up and try and get my mind off of things. Sitting on the couch with him was the happiest I had felt in months, and so I leaned over and kissed him. I felt bad about it, so I told her. Since she is my friend, I felt she had the right to know, but now I slightly regret it.

She's mad at me and won't talk to me. I tried to explain that I felt happy when I was with him, but she didn't care. She kept saying that he was her ex and I shouldn't have even gone over there.

I know I shouldn't have gone over there, and I know I was wrong to kiss him, but I feel like she should understand that I've had a lot of sh*t happen to me in the past few months, and she should be happy I'm finally happy, even if its with her ex...

But anyways, the question I'm asking is what do I do? I want to be happy, and I'm happy with him, but I don't want a guy to get between our friendship, at least anymore than he already has.


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What Guys Said 1

  • The damage is done and it comes down to your friend or your new boy toy... Pick one and accept what happens.

    Id personally pick your friend, Steve may look like a good guy right, but only because your in a sh*tty place. Tell her why you went over and kissed him and tell her your sorry. You just need to be loved and if she can't understand that, then I don't think she's your friend then. If that comes to that go with Steve but until then stay away from him. !


What Girls Said 1

  • The ex and the friend. Those are your two choices I'm afraid. If you continue to see Steve your friend will probably never forgive you, especially it was a bad break up. What you have to ask yourself "is it really worth losing a friend over?"

    I understand that you have had a lot happen to you over the past few months but did your friend support you during this time or completely turn her back on you?

    If she supported you, then I suggest you don't see Steve any more. Like all relationships, guys can't do anything wrong in the first few months until the honeymoon period is over. What's to say that he won't treat you like he treated your friend?

    If your friend didn't support you, then maybe give Steve a chance but you've really got to weigh up the pros and cons.

    Either way, the old saying stands "mates before dates"

    • She didn't really try to help me. she was around and we talked and stuff, but it was never about what was going on in my life. But I was always there to help her any chance I could if something was wrong. I really don't want to lose her as a friend, but I just feel like I do deserve to be happy.

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    • I mean the few times we've hung out have been as friends, and we've kissed like twice. I can't tell what he wants, but I feel like he might like me, but he'll be just as hesitant to start anything because of the same reason.

    • Well I guess, until Steve makes his intentions known then I would put your friend first. Just explain that you needed someone to be there and that was him. Hopefully it all works out! But I have a feeling it will go down to choosing between the two. Only you know whether or not the relationship or the friendship is the one you truly want :)

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