Why would your ex (who is a good friend) be so interested in text messages between you and your boyfriend?

my ex and I are pretty good friends like we are in the same clique and we write often on Facebook

he is single and I have a new boyfriend since 14 months (my ex and my new are also good friends)

my boyfriend and I quarrel a lot (also because I write sometimes with my ex) and I wanted to break up last week then I gave us a last chance and we had fights again and I wanted to break up again but I gave him another chance! for the next day I had invited our clique (also my ex) and before they all came we had a fight again and he drove home. my ex was punctual and was the first at my house and then I told him that my boyfriend and I had a quarrel again and I told him and another good friends who came a little later what I don't like about him and first my ex just wanted to check out my new iphone and then he saw that my boyfriend was writing me but I didn't wanted to answer and I also told my ex that we quarreled because of him and then he wanted to read the quarrel (most of the time my boyfriend and I just write messages) and in said okay because I am really open and don't have anything to hide and my ex was extremely interested in the text messages between me and my boyfriend

so now I wonder why was he so interested?


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • First off... lemme say that if you want a relationship to work, the solution isn't "well we argued, so I'm thinking about breaking up with him." That never works, and no relationship is perfect. There will always be arguments and fights. Furthermore, it is the hard times that make a relationship grow.

    Secondly... being open is great, fine and dandy, but gossiping to others when it really isn't any others' business (i.e. your ex) is no different from hiding it from your boyfriend. If you two are having fights, you need to keep it between you. If you're seeking legit advice, then sure, you can share, but be tactful in how you share that information and don't be "overly-open." Its a good way to damage a relationship.

    That said... he's probably interested because he wants to know what was said. That's really it. Did he know the conversation between you and your ex was about you and him and the fighting? If so... I don't blame him. I'd want to know what people are saying about me in such a situation as well. Furthermore, if you're considering breaking up with him and giving him "second chances" (since I'm sure all these fights are entirely his fault, right?), he may wonder if you're still considering breaking up, or what he's doing wrong... that you have to resort to your ex as a source of conversation, instead of dealing with the problem at the source... with your boyfriend. Your boyfriend should be your best friend, so I honestly don't see why you'd need to resort to anyone else to handle this situation.

    Furthermore, he may simply be jealous. I'd almost voucher to ask the question... "Why are you even dating this guy anymore?" Sounds like you and your ex just need to go back out and save your boyfriend some time.

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What Girls Said 1

  • I think that your relationship is between you and your boyfriend.

    when I'm dating someone new I tend to keep ex's out of the picture. I respect a guy a bit more if he does the same.

    it's OK to be friends with an ex. ask yourself why exactly are you even talking about anything to the ex? kind of have to learn this type of guy is interested in you but the way he's going about it is bad.

    if you are not that into your boyfriend, maybe end it? things will only get messy from here with the ex involved.

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