How can I move forward from break up?

So here is my story. I will cut some stuff out but it will be a long one.

My ex and I started dated for about 5 months. It had been a while since I had been with anyone and she had not been with anyone seriously since her divorce about a year ago. Her ex was a little abusive, physically and emotionally. That is what brought us together, I was there when she needed someone.

While we were seeing each other we got along wonderfully and we never had a single argument, not one. We'd bust each others balls a bit from time to time, jokingly most of the time. The one-day a little over a month ago I yelled at her about something that was trivial and just dumped on her for a minute. The whole thing happened in the amount of time it took us to walk maybe 25yrds.

She didn't say much the rest of the day and when I apologized, she said thank you but I need a little time to deal with this. I wasn't happy to hear this but I respected her decision. A couple of days later after very little contact, I sent her some flowers, which was a huge mistake, I then received a text saying she couldn't see me anymore right now. Hindsight,

right? Then a couple of days later we had one phone call where she was going to explain what what going on with us. However it just turned into me apologizing again and her saying how much it hurt her. We ended it with her saying we could be together again but we'd have to work on it, maybe a fresh start.

In the month since then, we have seen each other several times due to our jobs. We flirt with each other, have nice conversations, talk about problems, etc. Things have all seemed somewhat OK to me since she is still acting this way. Outside of work the has been virtually no contact other than a couple of random texts about nothing and one

brief phone call.

The first couple of weeks were really hard due to having a nice time then not hearing from her at all, then things started getting a little better for me. I started trying to do things, improve myself, and all that. It didn't really get my mind off her at all but I at least

felt a little better. Then this week it started all over again. I really started missing her and since it had been over a month with out any real idea of what's going on from her end, I started to worry myself about waiting to long to whatever I can do (which is a confusing one as well).

I really love this girl and miss her and I've done a lot of thinking about what happend over the realationship and not just the fight. I know I didn't do a great job of showing her

How much she meant while we were together, a terrible mistake. I did show her, just not as much as I should have. I said some things right after the break that I should have said long before it got to that point and I really regret it.

I do want her back and I really believe that the two of us can make this work. I

just want the chance to show her how much I care and love her and how, even though I walked on egg shells about it at first, the two of

Updates:
us want the same things out of life. I

want nothing more than to have a family, enjoy life, and enjoy the world and I want to do all these this with her.


What is your take on the situation and what kind of advice do you have to get the chance I seek to show her how much she means to me? Please no move on, enjoy life, find someone else sort of things. I realize this is probably the easiest option and most likely so I don't need to hear it again and again.


Thanks for reading

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It seems sorta juvenile for her to get mad over a little fight like that, with you saying how strong the relationship is, just seems odd to me she would throw it all away over an argument. Maybe there is something deeper going on inside of her. My advice: Fight for her till your last breath. This will show her you care and want to be with her and are truly sorry. Seem to me like its not over for her either, but maybe she was so taken back when you yelled at her, she's in shock and she may feel like she doesn't know that part of you to yell and it was very alarming to her. At the least, you will know that you did everything you could to make it right and if it doesn't work out still, you will be able to sleep at night. hope that helps!

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    • Thanks Sky. -- I agree it was odd, we did have a good relationship. That's why it hurt so much. I caught her by surprise, but she did me as well. You were right on about "she was so taken back when you yelled at her, she's in shock and she may feel like she doesn't know that part of you." She actually said almost that exact thing to me. She was afraid it would get worse. It just brought up her past. I have to ask what you saw when you said "Seems to me like its not over for her either"

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    • Sorry to hear your in a rough patch as well. Unfortunately I don't have the knowledge you seem to have about these things. I voted you as the best. Thanks again for the chat. I'll let ya know how things pan out. :)

    • Sweet! Thanks! :)

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